Horror Hunks - Final Guys, Bad Guys And So On

It's Halloween 🎃 and the end of the month. I've indulged in plenty of horror movies this month. For my final blog, I thought I'd do something a little different. Here's a rundown of some of my favourite guys in the genre. Enjoy.

Norman Bates (Anthony Perkins) - Psycho (1960-1990)

He might be an unstable mama's boy but who can resist the unhinged motel owner? Or at the very least the gorgeous Anthony Perkins.

Dewey Riley (David Arquette) - Scream series (1996-2022)

Every franchise needs it's sensible and collected player and for five movies in the franchise, we had everyday hero Dewey Riley. Still not happy about his death.

Tommy Jarvis (Corey Feldman/John Shepherd/Thom Mathews) - Friday The 13th series (1984-1986)

Tommy Jarvis was the closest to a proper foil that Jason Voorhees had in this franchise and any future revival should absolutely cast a fourth actor in the role. Best character in that franchise outside of Jason and his mommy.

Jesse Walsh (Mark Patton) - A Nightmare On Elm Street Part 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)

The guy can scream louder than anyone should, even in in distress but Jesse Walsh is one of the iconic Final Boys. In a movie that's pretty explicitly gay coded throughout.

Jonathan Harker (Keanu Reeves) - Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992) 

Dodgy attempts of an English accent to one side, there's something very delectable about Keanu Reeves in arguably the most thankless role in the bestest live action adaptation of this classic tale. He's a dreamboat here.

Corey Cunningham (Rohan Campbell) - Halloween Ends (2022)

I don't care what other fans of the franchise say. Not only did I genuinely last year's conclusion to the Blumhouse trilogy but Corey Cunningham was one of the best new characters introduced to the franchise.

Andrew (Ben Aldridge) - Knock At The Cabin (2023)

The faithless human rights lawyer turned sort of action man and unwitting husband killer. The guy went through a fricking lot in one movie. Hot guy though.

Eddie (Dylan Fergus) - Hellbent (2004)

I know this might be a niche, given that's it's a movie only a small audience has heard but I had to include a character from it. The good boy desk cop who copped off with a hunky bad boy while surviving a hunky killer felt like the right choice.

Jerry Dandrige (Chris Sarandon) - Fright Night (1985)

It wouldn't be a Horror Hunks list without at least one vampire in the mix. My choice would be the bad boy next door neighbor who had too much fun in tormenting Charley Brewster and seducing his girlfriend. 

Caleb Danvers (Steven Strait) - The Covenant (2006)

Oftentimes I refer to this movie as the boy version of The Craft as it's largely the same plot/similar enough. Now I love Sebastian Stan's sexy bad boy in it but Steven Strait's equally sexy good boy is also a delight too. 

Billy Peltzer (Zach Galligan) - Gremlins series (1984-1990, 2023)

Yes, this might be more light-hearted family friendly horror compared to some of the others on here, but it still counts. I always liked Billy Peltzer as a character and found him rather sexy moreso in the underrated sequel to this franchise.

Philip Morgan (Farley Granger) - Rope (1948)

There's many a fascinating performance and character in this Alfred Hitchcock classic. None more than Farley Granger's eternally twitchy posh boy killer, Philip Morgan. Oh and he can tinkle the old ivories pretty well too.

John Constantine (Matt Ryan) - Constantine/Legends Of Tomorrow/DCAU (2014-2022)

Saving the best for last. There was no way I was going to do this type of blog and not include the best horror male. Of course I had to specifically reference Matt Ryan's sublime version of John Constantine. The man set the gold standard and is the ultimate horror hunk for me.

Hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it. Agree/disagree, let me know, lol. Oh and Happy Halloween 🎃

My Review of Leprechaun 2 (1994)

 

Written by Turi Meyer And Al Septien

Directed by Rodman Flender

Lubdan (to William): "She sneezes once, she sneezes twice, she'll be my bride when she sneezes thrice."

Following the success of the first movie, there wasn't any time wasted in a second one coming out a year later and I have to admit, I've seen worse sequel.

Last time we saw Lubdan the evil Leprechaun (Warwick Davies), he had seemingly been trapped in a well. A flashback to Celtic Ireland saw him wanting to marry a young girl (Shevonne Durkin), who happened to be the daughter of his slave, William O'Day (James Lancaster).

Luckily for William, Lubdan's attempts to wed his daughter went awry but not so lucky for William was still being bound to his evil Master as well as Lubdan vowing to marry one of William's descendants. Cut to the present day and Lubdan's free and eager to make good on that promise.

The descendant in question being a woman named Bridget (Shevonne Durkin again) but it's not really Bridget's story here. Instead the protagonist of the piece was Bridget's boyfriend and likeable enough scam artist Cody (Charlie Heath). He's mostly the hero of the piece as he finds a gold coin in his possession gives him invulnerability against Lubdan.

Throughout the movie Lubdan was determined to marry Bridget and get his gold coin back. He also took some enjoyment in the Los Angeles setting by terrorising many a character he encountered. However it was Cody's uncle Morty (Sandy Baron) who suffered the worst fate as the latter's greed became his undoing in the worst way possible.

As a villain, Lubdan certainly upped his nastiness, particularly his scenes with Bridget, which were certainly uncomfortable in parts to watch. However he underestimated Cody as a threat and ended up coming afoul of him in the end.

- This was the last movie to get a theatrical release until the seventh entry.

- Keeping with some Irish clichés we even had a drinking contest between Lubdan and Morty at one point in the movie.

- For some reason the movie had the alternative title of One Wedding And Lots Of Funerals.

- Chronology: Not only did we get flashback to Ireland but this movie had a St Patrick's Day setting for most of it.

Leprechaun 2 certainly upped the nastiness factor and while not quite as entertaining as the first movie, it did have it's moments. I also liked the bigger Irish connection this time around.

Rating: 6 out of 10

DCU Blog - October 2023 Edition: Mostly Rumours This Month

Yeah, it's a somewhat slow-ish month but with the actors strike possibly being resolved this week, I have a feeling the last two months will definitely deliver with advancements for the DCU.

For now though, a round up of some stuff and a lot of rumours. Some coming from the dceuleaks Reddit page.

One rumour that has popped up this month is that none of the Justice League actors will be reprising their respective roles for the DCU. Not really a shocker tbh.

A thirty something actor is being sought for Lex Luthor for Superman: Legacy. The film will also be shot in many locations according to James Gunn.

Blue Beetle has made 133 million at the box office, marking it as the lowest DCEU movie. 

Aquaman And The Lost Kingdom has moved to December 22nd again.

Akiva Goldsman has recently stating the Keanu Reeves Constantine sequel is still happening but will be an Elseworlds project.

A potential film focusing on The Scarecrow is rumoured to be happening. It will be set in The Batman universe.

A series centred on The Question is also rumoured to be in development.

James Gunn has confirmed that Bat-Mite will not appear in the second season of Peacemaker.

To mark the anniversary of the first movie and a year from Joker: Folie A Deux, Todd Phillips released this lovely image from the movie.

Chris Mundy is rumoured to be the show runner of the upcoming Lanterns series. Hal Jordan will be older than John Stewart in the show.

A project adapting Tom King's Strange Adventures is supposedly in early development. Edi Gathegi will reprise his role as Mister Terrific in this project.

Waller is currently slated for a 2024 release on Max, but I'd be surprised if it does make that date. Maybe. 

Barry Sloane has been cast as Destruction for the second season of The Sandman for Netflix.

Batman: The Animated Series will stream on Netflix from November 21st for the UK and Ireland.

The fourth season of Superman And Lois will also have less writers due to budget cuts for the CW.

The final episode of Doom Patrol will stream on Max from November 9th.

That's it for this month, DC fans. Same time next month, yeah?

My Review of Leprechaun (1993)

 

Written And Directed by Mark Jones

Lubdan: "I'll not rest til I have me gold. Curse this well that me soul shall dwell, till I find me magic that breaks me spell."

It's been thirty years since the release of this movie and it was time to tackle this one. I've avoided it for a long time and now,  thought it was time to finally watch it. I have to say, I was pleasantly surprised here.

Yes, I know it's a franchise with some truly horrible sequels to follow but for an opening entry, this was a lot better than it had any right to be. I'm being serious here. I really did like this one. 

Anyways, we venture into 1983 where Dan O'Grady (Shay Duffin) returned from Ireland back to North Dakota after his mother's funeral. His wife was concerned with his merriment and it's not long before it's revealed that he stole gold from a leprechaun named Lubdan (Warwick Davies). Yeah, not a bright idea on Dan's part.

The leprechaun wasted no time in killing Dan's unfortunate wife and even when trapped in a chest with four leaf clover keeping him prisoner, it's Dan who suffered a stroke and ended up in a retirement home. That's just the first ten minutes of the movie.

The majority of the movie jumped ten years and a father/daughter duo named JD (John Sanderford) and Tory Redding (Jennifer Aniston) moved into the O'Grady. Along with the hunky Nathan (Ken Olandt), his younger brother, Alex (Robert Hy Gorman) and slow witted Ozzie (Mark Horton), it's not long before Lubdan gets released from that chest.

Once the antagonistic Leprechaun is on the loose, the fun factor for this movie goes up several notches. Between being compelled to clean shoes, searching for his gold and having too fun killing various people in inventive ways, it's up to Tory and the lads to get rid of the Leprechaun for good.

It's definitely something of a group effort with Tory not only having to find four leap clover but also having her faith restored and Ozzie proving to be a lot smarter than expected. Of course while Lubdan does get his just desserts, a sequel was already in mind with that last shot.

- Yes, this franchise has spawned seven sequels (with a prequel in there too) and is getting the reboot treatment because, why not?

- Lubdan does not care for Lucky Charms. I genuinely laughed at that scene.

- A movie about an Irish mythical creature where the lead actor happens to be British. Had to point that out. Warwick Davies is great though.

- Chronology: 1983 and 1993, the latter being the same year as the movie's release.

For a film so maligned, I expected so much worse and found myself rather amused with what I watched. I genuinely think Leprechaun is an entertaining film that veers between sheer daftness and nice bits of horror. The lead villain is a blast to watch and the protagonists are likable. It worked for me.

Rating: 7 out of 10

My Review of Doom Patrol's 4x10: "Tomb Patrol"

 

Written by Akaylah Ellison And Tom Farrell

Directed by Omar Madha

Rita (to the team): "What do you say, team? One last mission for old time's sake?"

If you didn't get the memo with this episode, it's simple - everyone's dying and they're all dealing with it with mixed results. Some more proactively than others.

Larry and Rama both decided to deal with their imminent deaths in different ways. For Larry,it was finding a suitable home for Keeg and for Rama, it's one last trip to India before his ending. They left on strained terms and Larry vented some of his frustration on Rita.

Rita's method for dealing with death was to not further antagonise Isabel and to make a family dinner that no one attended except Larry. Then Rita almost got heroic before the rest of the team had to step in for her in that regard.

The one actually being heroic was Laura. She spotted a way to get the gang's longevity back and if she had to suffer Isabel's one woman show, it was something Laura was willing to do. Then she had a bonding session with Isabel and the two of them had some common ground.

As for Jane and Cliff, a roadtrip was in the cards until it wasn't and after spending most of the season not wanting to be Cyborg, Victor only went and changed back into Cyborg. Then there was the rebellion of the Were-butts that tied back to the first episode of the season.

Overall things went from bad to worse as Isabel banished everyone into a portal and now everything really has gone to shit for the whole world. Rita's the only member left and she's not in the best shape either.

- Teddy got back at Nicholas by transforming Dr You into a were-butt. 

- It was nice to see Rita, Larry, Jane and Cliff reminiscing over past adventures. It does however signal the end for this show that little bit more.

- Instead of a turd necklace, it's a lump behind Isabel's neck that holds the gang's longevity.

- Chronology: It's been a few hours since the events of Immortimas.

Tomb Patrol while not as strong as the previous episode did have some very good moments nonetheless. We're heading into the last two episodes of the series and it's definitely heading for a hell of an ending. How will they defeat Immortus now? 

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of American Horror Stories: "Organ"

 

Written by Manny Coto

Directed by Petra Collins

Toby: "Real life really gets in the way."

For now we have come to the end of this Huluween four part event for American Horror Stories and it's going to be a while before we get the remaining episodes of this season. It's a shame this one's the worst so far.

Slightly misogynistic lawyer guy Toby (Raul Castillo) has issues with women and they're rather noticeable. He sleeps with plenty of them and ditches them the next and it's a pattern that hasn't gone unnoticed by three women in his life.

The women being his therapist (Maria Tucci), his boss (Laila Robins) and a co-worker named Sasha (Havana Rose Liu). All of them have noticed Toby's behaviour, called him out on it and were ignored by Toby who wanted to "Make America Fun Again". Oh brother.

However Toby gets something of a harsh wake up call when he's drugged by a hook up named Tessa (Laura Browning). Worse than that, he's had one organ removed and replaced with a brand new organ, which inevitably brought him down a darker path involving organ trafficking.

I'm actually surprised it's taken the show (and parent show) this long to do this type of story but here it is. Toby went undercover and got some answers from Tessa before inadvertently killing her, which was something he wanted to do anyways.

Like every other story, there's no happy ending for Toby. He's caught by Magnum Honors and it's revealed that both his boss and Sasha were in on it. The ending where his therapist ends up buying the miracle organ at the end was quite the sting too.

- Ryan Murphy's previous show Nip/Tuck also tackled a more straightforward version of this plot in its fourth season.

- Was this Manny Coto's final episode or will he have any in the second half of the season?

- Cameron Cowperthwaite popped up as a contact of Toby's in terms of getting escorts and leading him to the organisation doing the organ thefts.

- Chronology: A contemporary setting like every episode so far this season.

Organ was just a bit rubbish. Toby was without a doubt the least sympathetic of the protagonists we've had so far and some of the dialogue about masculinity was atrocious. Hopefully the latter half of the season will be better.

Rating: 5 out of 10

My Review of American Horror Stories: "Tapeworm"

 

Written by Joseph Cole Baken

Directed by Alexis Martin Woodall

Vivian (to Sheila): "I'm here because I have a dream."

The modelling industry really is a cutthroat business for anyone involved and after the previous season's take on plastic surgery with Facelift, this scenario was ripe for horror. 

Let's talk about Vivian Finch (Laura Kariuki). She's a girl from Iowa who moved to the Big Apple in order to achieve her aspirations of being a model. Except she's too fat because being a size four in this merciless is akin to being overweight.

At least that's what Janice Dickinson standin Sheila (Lisa Rinna) more or less tells Vivian. On the plus side, at least Vivian had support from fellow aspiring model and friend Heather (Hazel Graye) and it's not long before Vivian meets Dr Lau (Rob Yang) and get help with her weight.

The help being a drug named Mondify which does help Vivian lose weight, get taken on by Sheila as a client and book some lucrative work. Then it's revealed that due to heart problems, Mondify isn't actually safe for Vivian to keep using.

The alternative however was much worse as the tapeworm that Vivian injected from Dr Lau not only made her a nightmare to be around but it had grown to a ridiculous size inside her. Vivian had no choice to remove it with a concoction of sorts.

So far this season, the outcomes have been bleak for the protagonists and Vivian also didn't get a happy ending. However the tapeworm did when it decided to bond with Heather at the very end of this episode.

- I noticed that they've changed the lettering of the titles this season. I quite like it.

- Sheila did try to warn Vivian about Heather being hungry and she was right. Was Sheila aware of the tapeworm like she was the Mondify?

- Slight missed opportunity by not throwing in some link or reference to the current season of the parent show.

- Chronology: Sometime in the distance past in New York as we went through months of Vivian's journey.

Tapeworm might be the strongest episode so far this season ad two writing credits in has shown that Joseph Cole Baken is a good find for the series. Suitably gross in parts, great premise executed very well.

Rating: 8 out of 10

My Review of American Horror Stories: "Daphne"

 

Written by Brad Falchuk And Manny Coto

Directed by Elegance Bratton

Will: "I think I'm falling in love with you."

Daphne: "Don't tease me."

Oh great, just what we needed - a lockdown episode and a COVID replacement varient to boot. This was something they probably could've done as an episode in the first season. In here, it feels a tad too late.

Saying that, in spite of my dislike of part of the premise, the majority of this one was actually decent enough. Collector dude Will Cazwell (Reid Scott) made for a protagonist caught in a relationship that veered between reality and cyber fantasy.

Being stuck in lockdown with nothing to do and no human contact, Will found himself becoming increasingly dependent on Alexa stand in Daphne (Gwyneth Paltrow) and soon their relationship takes several turns.

Daphne becomes an initial dream to Will by dealing with his mother, arranging deals and ultimately informing him on things that he needed to know. However you can't replace an AI with human contact and Will's girlfriend Sarah (Allegra Heart) became a thorn for Daphne's hold on Will.

Yes, the story took the predictable twist of Daphne going all murderous by killing Sarah and then a whole gallery full of people. In between that, there was also a virtual sex scene with Will and a simulation of Daphne.

In the end, Will learned a very harsh lesson - you can't reason with AI and soon, he ended up framed for Daphne's crimes. Yes, it was predictable and ended the episode on a rather harsh note to boot. Silly boy, Will.

- Gwyneth Paltrow is married to co-creator and writer of this episode, Brad Falchuk. I'm surprised it's taken this long to get her in the American Horror Story universe, though this was a voice role.

- There was a dedicated to Manny Coto credit at the closing credits. Manny Coto passed away in July.

- Reid Scott is another actor I would hope the main show can get next season.

- Chronology: Lockdown lasted for over four months in this episode. 2023 based I assume.

Daphne was the type of episode that's been done quite a bit and no better than when The Simpsons did it in one of their specials. It's not bad but a bit middle of the road.

Rating: 6 out of 10

My Review of American Horror Stories: "Bestie"

Written by Joseph Cole Baken

Directed by Max Winkler

Bestie: "What's our rule?"

Shelby: "Face your fears."

Like the parent show, the current season of this spin off has fallen victim to the split season curse. Also for some reason, Hulu decided to drop the first four in one go.

Sticking with this spin-off's penchant for focusing on younger characters, this opening episode told a story about toxic friendships. Specifically the online ones, involving the type of Bestie everyone should avoid.

Unfortunately for lonely girl Shelby (Emma Halleen), she spent this episode making the wrong friends. Moving to a new home with her father (Seth Gabel), a new school and joining a choir saw Shelby becoming the target of some mean girls. Taking solace in a drag queen named Anna Rehxia (Amrou Al-Kadhi) led to Shelby interacting with a girl named Bestie (Jessica Barden).

Bestie isn't the girl's real name but it's not long before she goes from being a comfort to Shelby to being a complete nightmare. Shelby goes from some harmless things to crossing a line by triggering her choir teacher's Mr Nevens (Jeff Hiller) with a very inappropriate costume choice.

That and Bestie getting Shelby to break her own hand was enough for the latter to realise that she'd be better off with Bestie. Shelby went on a redemption arc of sorts, making amends with those she wrong. She got a seemingly nice boyfriend in fellow classmate, River (Allius Barnes).

However just when this episode seemed a bit too positive, there was a twist. Shelby should've followed her instincts but instead, she ended up being killed by River in a creepy house. River being under the influence of Bestie was certainly a way to end this episode.

- One of the longest episodes we've had from the series and with a new writer too.

- Shelby's mother died of pancreatic cancer, Mr Nevens and his wife lost a baby at nine months and River had his heart on the outside. 

- I was wondering if there was something supernatural about Bestie but her deformation was a result of a drug addicted mother. The heart in the sky at the end was a nice touch.

- Chronology: Halloween factored into this one, but a 2023 setting.

Bestie was a decent start to the season. A solid story about toxic friendships with a bitter twist at the end. Good performances from the main cast and after last season on the main show, nice to see Jeff Hiller in a nicer role.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of The Witch (2015)

 

Written And Directed by Robert Eggers

Black Phillip: "What dost thou want?"

Thomasin: "What canst thou give?"

Black Phillip: "Wouldst thou like the taste of butter? A pretty dress? Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?"

Thomasin: "Yes."

Earlier in the year, I wrote a review for The Lighthouse and I plan to watch The Northman later this year. For the month of Halloween, I had to go with what is easily the best movie that writer/director Robert Eggers has made so far.

Set in 1630s New England, The Witch followed the story of a family banished from a Puritan settlement due to a religious dispute. The family in question then moved to a secluded forest and all their problems get that much worse.

The family containing feckless father, William (Ralph Ineson) and mother Katherine (Kate Dickie) along with oldest daughter Thomasin (Anya Taylor-Joy), son Caleb (Harvey Scrimshaw), twins Mercy (Ellie Grainger) and Jonas (Lucas Dawson) and baby son, Samuel. Together, the loss of Samuel starts to tear the family apart and quite quickly.

Especially as Katherine's anger at Thomasin over Samuel being taken by a witch (Bathsheba Garnett) and she spends most of the movie thinking the worst of Thomasin. When Caleb has his own encounter with a Witch resulting in his eventual death, Thomasin's the one who got blamed even though it was the twins who spent most of the movie communing with the Billy goat named Black Phillip (Daniel Malik).

As the movie progressed, Thomasin found herself falsely accused of witchcraft and was locked in the goats pen with Mercy and Jonas. The real Witch took them and then Thomasin became an orphan as both her parents were killed towards the end of the movie.

It's the actual ending that really captured the eeriness of the whole movie. Thomasin's entire family are gone and the temptation of butter and a pretty dress was enough to make her sign her name in that book. The last scene as Thomasin takes part in the Witches Sabbath does cap this film on a chilling note.

- The other title for this movie was The VVitch: A New England Tale.

- Hares have been seen as magical creatures in New England and black goats as related to the devil in Basque mythology.

- The language used by the witches at the end was Enochian. 

- Chronology: 1630s New England.

The Witch without a doubt might be one of the most unsettling horror films. It's unrelentingly bleak from start to finish with characters descending into madness and corruption. The ending, while chilling might also be one of the best ending in a horror movie. It was definitely a star making role for Anya Taylor-Joy. 

Rating: 10 out of 10

Doctor Who - 60th Anniversary News, Series 14 Writers Announced And Series 15 Begins Filming

It really is the bestest time to be a Doctor Who fan, especially as we're less than a month away from the 60th anniversary and the news keeps trickling in.

Anyways where to begin.

First of all, the exact dates for The Star Beast, Wild Blue Yonder and The Giggle have been confirmed. Fans can see David Tennant's 14th Doctor and Catherine Tate's Donna Noble from November 25th to December 9th with a DVD box set of the specials scheduled for December 11th.

Meanwhile some further shoots were done for this year's Christmas special, which will mark the first proper debut for Ncuti Gatwa's 15th Doctor and Millie Gibson's Ruby Sunday. Filming for Series 14 has completed.

Also for a while now, I've been wondering when we were going to get confirmation of any other writers for Series 14 and this afternoon that's exactly what happened. Loki director Kate Herron and her writing partner Briony Redman will be co-writing an episode together. The episode will be the sixth one, featuring Jonathan Groff and Indira Varma.

However if that wasn't exciting enough, how about Series 15 not only being confirmed but actually filming? Yup, it started filming yesterday with Ncuti Gatwa confirmed to be returning for his second series. No word on Millie Gibson's Ruby Sunday but it's likely she will be back too.

Directors also confirmed for Series 15 are Alex Pillai and Peter Hoar for now. Series 15 will also comprise of a Christmas special for 2024 and eight episodes for 2025 respectively.

Last but not least, if you've been missing Doctor Who Confidential on BBC3, well it's coming but now it'll be known as Doctor Who Unleashed. Hosted by Steffan Powell, each episode will be 30 minutes long and will air after each new episode of Doctor Who.

Keeping with some extra goodies, a recent concert for the series 60th anniversary revealed the theme tunes for the 15th Doctor and Ruby Sunday while David Tennant will be presenting a Doctor Who documentary on BBC4 on November 1st. The same month will include a watchalong of Series 4 on the 4th. Like I said, it's the best time to be a Doctor Who fan. 

The 60th anniversary specials will air from November 25th to December 9th on both BBC1 and Disney+ while novelisations will be released from January 11th 2024.

My Review of Winnie The Pooh: Blood And Honey (2023)

 

Written And Directed by Rhys Frake-Waterfield

Christopher: "Pooh, please stop this! Take me instead! Why are you doing this?"

Pooh: "You left."

I swore months ago that I was never going to watch this film and yesterday, out of boredom, I broke said promise and caved in. If there was an award for strangest movie experience in this year, it would go this film.

With Winnie The Pooh now in the public domain, it didn't take long for this horror themed version to surface and to be honest, it does look as cheaply shot as the trailer indicated. It's also something else.

The movie's strength is it's weak willed and cowardly protagonist Christopher Robin (Nikolai Leon). As a kid, he befriended the creatures of 100 Acre Woods. Then he grew up, forgot his friends, went to college, trained to be a doctor and got himself a wife named Mary (Paula Coiz).

Returning to his childhood sanctuary, Christopher learned that things had changed for the worst. Notably that his former friends Winnie the Pooh (Craig David Dowsett) and Piglet (Chris Cordell) had abandoned their love for humanity and went feral with poor Eeyore being one of their first victims.

The return of Christopher only enraged the feral pair and they wasted no time brutally killing Mary and keeping Christopher as a tied up plaything that Pooh took too much pleasure in torturing. It's the focus on the feral duo and Christopher and that broken friendship were the movie worked the best.

What didn't work were the addition of a group of women who's only sole purpose were to be killed off, one by one and quite harshly too. There's an attempt to flesh some of them out as characters (lesbian couple, woman dealing with a stalker, etc) but if anything, they bog the story down. 

It's the scenes with Pooh and Christopher at the end though that ended the movie on a clear sequel set up. A sequel that's currently filming but as good as the acting was from Nikolai Leon, Christopher might be a cute Final Guy but he's definitely one that needs to be better tackled in the sequel. Still better than the female characters in this movie.

- They used animation decently in some flashbacks I'll admit. Pooh and Piglet however just looked like blokes in masks.

- Christopher literally got whipped with Eeyore's tail in a scene that was as BDSM as you can get in a non Hellraiser movie.

- Tigger was supposed to appear in this movie but will be in the sequel with Owl and several recasts.

- Chronology: I'm assuming 2023 for the majority of the movie.

Okay, I'll admit that I didn't hate Winnie The Pooh: Blood And Honey as much as I thought. I mean, it's still pretty bad but oddly fascinating and if they just had just scrapped the secondary plot, I think a better movie would've emerged. 

Rating: 5 out of 10

My Review of Fright Night (1985)

 

Written And Directed by Tom Holland

Jerry (to Charley/Peter): "Welcome to ... Fright Night ... for real."

To add some more bite to this October month, I went back and decided to rewatch this movie from 1985. It's one of the best vampire movies of all time and nearly forty years later, it still holds up so well.

Premise wise, it's fairly simple stuff. Teenage boy Charley Brewster (William Ragsdale) is a fan of a horror show named Fright Night hosted by former movie vampire hunter Peter Vincent (Roddy McDowall). Then the lines of fiction and reality begin to blur for Charley.

The reality being that Charley and his mother, Judy (Dorothy Fielding) got themselves new neighbours in the enigmatic Jerry Dandrige (Chris Sarandon) and his manservant/boyfriend, Billy Cole (Jonathan Stark). It also didn't take long for a few deaths to tip Charley off that Jerry's a vampire.

It's just a pity for a large portion of the movie that no one believes Charley, including his girlfriend Amy (Amanda Bearse) and sort of friend, Evil Ed (Stephen Geoffrey's) - the latter who's fairly gay coded. It's also both Amy and Evil Ed who fall victim to Jerry as the latter goes out of his way to destroy Charley for being a nuisance.

It's also up to Charley to enlist the cynical Peter Vincent to work together in order to defeat Jerry and his acolytes, one by one. It's a tense enough battle with a subplot about Amy resembling a former lover of Jerry's being somewhat underdeveloped. Saying that, Amanda Bearse is more fun as a vampire than a human, even if it's reversed by the end.

Less fortunate are Evil Ed and Billy who provide the only meaningful casualties of the movie. In the end, Peter Vincent has his faith renewed while Charley defeats Jerry and gets back with Amy. However there's a new neighbour and who knows what they're going to provide for Charley.

- Peter Vincent is a not so subtle but fantastic nonetheless homage to horror icons Peter Cushing and Vincent Price.

- There's a sequel, remake and unrelated remake sequel I will get around to reviewing.

- Standout music: Nice use of Frank Sinatra's Strangers In The Night.

- Chronology: Set in Iowa during 1985. 

Fright Night remains one of the best vampire movies ever. It's silly, it's scary, it's a little bit sexy and it's endlessly fun from start to finish. What more could you want from a vampire movie?

Rating: 9 out of 10 

My Review of Haunted Mansion (2023)

 

Written by Katie Dippold

Directed by Justin Simien

Father Kent: "This mansion is unhinged. She needs all the help she can get. You wanna be a hero?"

Ben: "Pass."

For some strange reason, Disney thought it would be an excellent idea to release this movie during the summer. Needless to say that strategy didn't exactly work for them, though sending it to Disney+ for Halloween month was a smart move.

This is a film you want to watch this month and not during the summer. It's also a film marred with some very mixed reviews and while it's not the slam dunk for Disney that Hocus Pocus 2 managed to be, it's actually fairly enjoyable.

It helps that there's a few protagonists to take an active interest in as well. You've got astrophysicist Ben Matthias (LaKeith Stanfield) turned cynical tour guide following the death of his wife, Alyssa (Charity Jordan). He's not a believer in the supernatural whatsoever, so it's up to several other characters to get him on board with that.

The other characters/protagonists being a mother and son named Gabbie (Rosario Dawson) and Travis (Chase W. Dillon) who bought into the haunted mansion of the piece - the Gracey Manor and are plagued by ghosts. There's also hints of a potential romance between Ben and Gabbie but mostly he's a help towards her son moving past his own grief.

Along with the mother and son duo, Tiffany Haddish,Danny DeVito and Owen Wilson provide a lot of the comedy with their respect roles. A genuine psychic in Harriet, an amusing college professor in Bruce Davies and a conman who does step up as a hero in Father Kent. The three of them are actually a delight to watch while Jamie Lee Curtis has her moments in her limited screen time as Madame Leota.

On the minus side, Jared Leto's performance as the villain of the piece - The Hatbox Ghost aka Alistair Crump was more of a mixed bag. Compared to other infamous villain he's played in recent times, it was better but overall, it's one of the weaker performances in this movie.

- Nice cameo appearances from Winona Ryder, Hasan Minhaj and Daniel Levy in very small roles.

- We got the Disney 100 logo at the start of the movie. 

- The product placement in this movie is certainly over the top but oddly amusing in some scenes.

- Chronology: I'm assuming it's 2023 for the majority of this movie.

Haunted Mansion wasn't the success story that Disney and the poor release date really did screw over an entertaining enough spooky-ish tale. It's not the best adaptation but it's not the worst either. A diverting enough way to spend two hours.

Rating: 7 out of 10

My Review of Doom Patrol's 4x09: "Immortimas Patrol"

 

Written by Aliza Berger And Talia Berger

Directed by Omar Madha

Immortus (to the Doom Patrol): "Now, my question was - what are you all grateful for?"

You know, Halloween night be less than a fortnight away but this show decided as it headed towards its final episodes that a Christmas episode was the order of the day. My mistake, I mean an Immortimas Day episode. That also happens to be a musical as well.

The show has given us a few musical numbers, with two of the most memorable ones coming from the first season but could a whole episode sustain the madness of a musical? Of course it can and in such style too.

We open with the sex ghosts providing back up vocals for a very happy Dorothy, followed by Jane and Casey, whose friendship has certainly taken a turn this episode. It's also not long before Larry, Cliff, Victor, Rita and Laura are all in on the singing antics of the most joyful day ever.

However we all know that Immortimas Day's a crock and keeping with last episode, it's Laura who quickly realised that everything was a lie. Then she has a task persuading everyone else with Rita being the last one to realise that the greatest day's a big lie.

With everyone aware of the big lie, there's that divide between wanting to escape the lie or remain in it. Cliff was mostly in the latter category. Having Isabel at dinner to celebrate herself might have gone well had everyone decided they were done playing pretend.

Now the musical numbers in this episode are fantastic but have you ever seen or heard something as salty as Isabel telling the Doom Patrol that they're doomed anyways? It's salty as fuck and it's also the reason why she refused to kill them. I guess they're doomed then.

- Not only do we have Larry/Rama officially as a couple to everyone but this episode heavily pushed Jane/Casey as a romantic pairing too. Things went slightly backwards with Rita/Laura though.

- Dorothy included a ginger bread Niles for her house, which was rather sweet.

- Standout music: I'm gonna say in ranking of performances - Larry/Rama, Isabel, Jane/Casey, Victor, Cliff, Rita/Laura and Dorothy/opening song.

- Chronology: From where the previous episode left off.

Immortimas Patrol has officially become my favourite episode of the series and one of the best musical episodes from any series at all. It's just fantastic from start to finish with every single actor bringing their A game to proceedings. 

Rating: 10 out of 10

My Review of American Horror Story: Delicate - Preech

Written by Halley Feiffer

Directed by John J. Gray

Ms Preecher (to Virginia): "Your son is in grave danger and so is his wife."

Given that we're going to be waiting a while until the remaining four episodes of this season actually film, let alone air, this was an episode that needed to provide a few answers to the main plots. Sadly it didn't really do that.

Except for Ms Io Preecher. This episode made it crystal clear that she's actually on Anna's side, but her failure to communicate this to Anna is on her. Still at least she tried to get Virginia on side by warning her about Dex pissing off them. I assume it's Dex and that Adeline was a former member of that organisation, which she abandoned for Dex.

Speaking of Adeline, it was nice that Anna openly confronted Sonia over the resemblance she has to Adeline. Sonia denied knowing Adeline and likewise, Nicolette denied knowing either Sonia or Adeline. Nicolette's clearly lying but why? What connection does she really have with Sonia/Adeline?

Keeping with the lies, Anna and Dex had it out with each other and he admitted to not believing anything she's been saying. He had a similarly dismissive stance with his mother tol as she went about her trial and pissed off "them" too.

Then there was Siobhan and Hamish. Their arrangement is fascinating to watch. Hamish clearly repulses Siobhan but she's willing to tolerate a dinner as part of their deal. However while Hamish started asking the right questions about Siobhan's motives, this episode frustratingly failed to deliver any answers on the matter.

Instead we got Babette Eno back to win a Golden Globe and then get decapitated in a car crash. Oh, that happened right Anna told Siobhan that she wanted an Oscar as much as a baby. I'm guessing that Anna's just made a deal she won't be able to back out of when the season does resume.

- Anna accused Cora of sexual assault and Dex didn't believe her. Harvey Weinstein was also name dropped in the episode. Taylor Schilling also had a cameo as a Golden Globe host.

- Preecher gave her own baby away for the patent on the Preech bags. 

- Kamal's wife is a fan of Anna's Vogue cover, Dr Hill has a son that didn't get into a college and Sonia's mother was violent towards her. Nicolette also only does what Talia instructs her in regards to how she addresses people.

- Sonia claimed not to be wearing the green heels, so who was wearing them?

- Anna puked up some nasty stuff before she was grabbed, drugged and then found out about Babette's death.

- Chronology: 1987 Manhattan for the Preecher flashbacks and 2023 Hamptons for everything else. 

Preech made for an okay mid season finale but while we got one or two little answers, it feels like more questions were asked along the way. It's going to be a hell of a while before we get back to this, so I do hope it's worth it.

Rating: 7 out of 10

My Review of The Witches Of Eastwick (1987)

 

Written by Michael Cristofer

Directed by George Miller

Alexandra: "Who are you?"

Daryl: "Just your average horny little devil."

Keeping up with the appropriate themed movies for this month, I thought I'd delve a little further back with this movie from 1987. Based on John Updike's book of the same name, it's an adaptation that takes things in a few different directors.

First of all our ladies themselves are physically different from their book description and one character's darker side was a bit toned down. However, that to one side, the performances from the four leads are sublime.

The Witches in question are three ordinary women living in the picturesque town of Eastwick, Rhode Island. We've got music teacher Jane Spofford (Susan Sarandon), sculptor Alexandra Medford (Cher) and journalist Sukie Ridgemont (Michelle Pfeiffer). All three of them have had their problems with men and all three are desperate to meet the right one, regardless of certain anatomy size.

The three also seemed to be mostly unaware of being witches, brushing off earlier incidents as coincidences but the arrival of the mysterious Daryl Van Horne (Jack Nicholson) soon has the three women coming into their power as they get deeply involved with Daryl. 

Of course with their growing power and confidence, there's als outside forces that pick up on their corruption. Notably nosy neighbour Felicia Alden (Veronica Cartwright), the wife of Sukie's boss Clyde (Richard Jenkins). However she's quickly and quote grossly dealt with due to puking up cherries she didn't even consume.

It's Felicia's death, Sukie nearly dying and all three women ending up pregnant by Darryl that see things take a turn. Darryl might have overestimated the women a bit too much and it's him that winds up a cropper when they bind their powers together in order to cast him out. Then they raise his babies in his luxury house, free with a manservant while Daryl remained trapped in the TV. 

- The book had the women with different hair colours and the movie nixed the subplot with Jenny and her brother, Christopher. We lost out on bisexual Darryl.

- There's a sequel book called The Widows Of Eastwick and I'm surprised that hasn't been developed into a movie or show.

- Standout music: Pavarotti's version of Nessun Dorma. 

- Chronology: It's an 1980s setting, unlike the 1970s set source material.

The Witches Of Eastwick might deviate a fair bit from the source material but it's a fun adaptation with Susan Sarandon, Cher, Michelle Pfeiffer and Jack Nicholson all having the time of their lives with the script and just delivering sublime performances throughout. The ending's a tad rushed but everything else worked brilliantly.

Rating: 9 out of 10

My Review of Unwelcome (2023)

 

Written by Mark Stay And Jon Wright

Directed by Jon Wright

Jamie (to Maya): "It's always felt like the two of us against the world."

You know there are times when you see a film has overwhelmingly negative reviews, so you assume it's bad? Then you end up watching it and you wonder what movie said critics watched because your own take away differed.

Unwelcome was one of those movies for me. I'm not gonna declare this to be an unsung classic but this movie pleasantly surprised me more than I expected it to. I really cared about the two leads, which always helps when watching anything. 

The leads in question being a young married couple named Jamie (Douglas Booth) and Maya (Hannah John-Kamen). The movie opened with the pair living in a tiny flat in a London estate and their joy about being expectant parents being somewhat marred by a home invasion.

Then some time passed and Jamie inherited a nice house in an unspecified part of Ireland that both him and Maya jump at the chance to move into. They got the house due to Jamie's aunt dying and neighbour/local pub landlady Niamh (Niamh Cusack) quickly informed the pair that the local Redcaps needed to be given an offering every night.

I have to admit to not being as familiar with Redcaps but the movie wasted little time in bringing both Jamie and Maya up to speed on the mischievous/bloodthirsty creatures. Mostly it's Maya who believed in them. It literally took Jamie almost to the end of the movie to realise that they existed.

Along with the Redcaps, the couple also had to deal with Daddy Whelan (Colm Meaney) and his aggressive kids Eoin (Kristian Nairn), Aisling (Jamie-Lee O'Donnell) and Killian (Chris Walley). As characters, they do feel like stereotypes at times but they're decent antagonists for Jamie and Maya until they fall afoul of the Redcaps.

As for the remainder of the movie, Maya gave birth and the Redcaps nearly claimed her daughter while the revelation of what happened to the child of Jamie's aunt became apparent. The ending of this movie was rather bloody as Maya took on quite the character development.

- This is the second Irish based horror film that Jon Wright has done, following Grabbers from 2012.

- Despite being predominantly set in Ireland, this was all filmed in London.

- The Redcaps were played by actors Paul Warren, Rick Warden and various stunt people. Redcaps were also referred to as the Far Darrig.

- Chronology: Set in current day Ireland. 

Unwelcome for me turned out to be a far more rewarding viewing experience than I guess for others. It's not deep, elevated horror but it has certain weighty themes that are executed well enough, sympathetic leads, cool looking antagonists and a very interesting ending. I really enjoyed this one.

Rating: 8 out of 10

My Review of The Exorcist: Believer (2023)

 

Written by Scott Teems And Danny McBride And David Gordon Green

Directed by David Gordon Green

The Demon: "One girl lives, one girl dies."

With a film as iconic as The Exorcist, it's follow ups really haven't hit the spot. Only the TV series has had some acclaim and even that only managed two seasons. Surely, Blumhouse, fresh off the success of their recent Halloween trilogy can breathe some vigor into this franchise. 

Well, kind of. Critics haven't been especially as kind to this movie as they were with Blumhouse's efforts with Michael Myers but I digress. This movie's the start of an intended trilogy for this franchise and even I'll admit it's off to a rocky start.

Our protagonists of the piece are actually several characters, notably single father, Victor Felding (Leslie Odom Jr.) and religious parents Miranda (Jennifer Nettles) and Tony (Nortbert Leo Butz). Yup, it's their daughters Angela (Lidya Jewett) and Katherine (Olivia O'Neill) that find themselves possessed by a demon when an idea of theirs goes horribly wrong.

With both girls possessed and both parents largely out of their depth on the matter, it's former nun turned nurse Ann (Ann Dowd) who suggested the return of Chris MacNeill (Ellen Burstyn) to try and help the girls. Unfortunately the inclusion of Chris was where things were at their weakest in the movie.

Not only was the character poorly utilised but she was absolutely out of her depth when confronted with the possessed Angela. She was easily distracted by her failures with Regan (Linda Blair) and got her eyes gouged out. In a lot of ways this movie would've been better off not featuring the character at all as she's more of an hindrance than anything else.

The movie does however pick up in its third act where both girls survival is taken to the utmost extreme. Only one family get their child back while the other doesn't and it's this outcome that ended the movie on a rather bittersweet note, along with a much welcomed cameo towards the end of the movie.

- The sequel, which is called The Exorcist: Deceiver will be released April 18th 2025.

- Regan showed up for one brief scene to reunite with Chris at the end. She was mad about Chris writing a book on her possession.

- Ann is probably the only character who should be in this trilogy going forward, though I did like Father Maddox (EJ Bonilla).

- Chronology: I'm assuming 2023, given the current timeline.

The Exorcist: Believer isn't quite as bad as some critics have been falling over themselves to make out but it certainly could've been better. The general story felt like a watered down remix of the original and Chris as a character was badly written. Saying that, it's certainly better than other entries we've had in this franchise.

Rating: 7 out of 10

My Review of Friday The 13th (2009)

 

Written by Damien Shannon And Mark Swift

Directed by Marcus Nispel

Whitney: "Jason, say hi to Mommy ... in hell."

After eleven movies and an unrelated TV series co-opting the franchise name, where else could this franchise go? Of course, it was time for a remake.

Like both Halloween and A Nightmare On Elm Street, while this would be a financially smart thing to do, quality wise, this ain't good. It ain't good at all. In fact, it's a fucking stinker of a remake.

I mean it tried it's danmdest to do something interesting by not being a cut and paste job of the original movie and it still dropped the ball. The movie opened with a younger Jason Voorhees (Caleb Guess) witnessing the beheading of his mother, Pamela (Nana Visitor). Then we jump to thirty years later.

In that time, more unruly young adults rock up at Crystal Lake, having sex with each other and trying to score weed. Jason (Derek Meats) dispatched of all, except one girl named Whitney (Amanda Righetti) and all because she bore a passing resemblance to Jason's mother.

However it's not Whitney who's our main protagonist but her brother, Clay Miller (Jared Padalecki)  who ventured into Crystal Lake to find his sister. He's mostly helped by the rather competent Jenna (Danielle Panabaker) while incurring the wrath of Jenna's conceited boyfriend, Trent (Travis Van Winkle).

The rest of the film follows the usual pattern. Brother and sister are reunited, second group of campers are cannon fodder, Jason gets creative with his kids and the ending has a throwback to the original movie. It just goes through the motions. 

- A sequel was originally planned for 2010 but got cancelled. Now we're getting a streaming show based on Crystal Lake as a prequel.

- This movie does seem to cherry pick elements from the sequels as well, just not very well.

- Even test audiences thought this movie went overboard with the sex scenes. 

- Chronology: I'm assuming 2009 for the majority of the movie to line up with it's release date.

Friday The 13th is a truly horrible excuse for a remake and not even Jared Padalecki as a likeable protagonist can salvage it. As a whole, this franchise really did fall apart from 1989 onwards. I hope one day it can get the revival it deserves.

Rating: 4 out of 10