My Review of Shell (2024)

 

Written by Jack Stanley

Directed by Max Minghella

Samantha: "I guess I just wanted you to look at me and see someone else."

If the idea of ageing actress resorting to an experimental beauty with dire consequences hadn't been explored enough in The Substance, then there's Shell. While former was in theatres, this one was doing the festival circuit. Does it work as an idea? I'd say yes it did.

The actress in question was Samantha Lake (Elisabeth Moss). She was known for a cheesy but feel good sitcom but the acting roles have dried up. Even when Samantha auditioned for a role that was suited to her, she lost out to the much younger Chloe Benson (Kaia Gerber). Chloe was a girl that Samantha used to babysit for back in the day.

Anyways Samantha's desperation to revive her acting career put her in the cross hairs of Dr. Hubert (Arian Moayed). He worked for Shell, which was founded by Zoe Shannon (Kate Hudson). Samantha underwent the procedure and ended up making friends with Zoe. On top of that, she also booked an acting gig. Things were looking up for her.

However if you've watched The Substance and Death Becomes Her, you'll know there's a downside to those type of rejuvenations. Samantha kept getting these grotesque black moles on her skin and Chloe's disappearance quickly alerted Samantha to the dangers of Shell.

There's a point in the movie made about Samantha being too trusting. It's evident in the way that it took very little for Zoe to get her on side. It's also something that Zoe had no problem throwing back at Samantha when she didn't need to pretend to be nice.

Anyways, the cops/FBI were under Shell's payroll, Dr. Hubert helped Samantha stabilise her condition but was still untrustworthy, Chloe turned into some hideously monster that was darkly lit and Zoe got her just desserts. The ending was a bit happier for Samantha compared to the other movies I've mentioned in this review.

- Elisabeth Moss and Max Minghella (the director) worked together on The Handmaid's Tale (2017-2025).

- Elizabeth Berkley popped up at the start of the movie as Jenna Janero. It didn't end well for her.

- Standout music: Connie Francis's Young At Heart.

- Chronology: Present day Los Angeles. Samantha write a book about her experience months after the events of the movie.

Shell had some interesting enough ideas that were executed well enough but at the same time, I think they could've pushed them better. I'll give both Elisabeth Moss and Kate Hudson their due as I think they did well with their respective roles.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of Possession (1981)

 

Written by Andrzej Żuławski And Frederic Tuten

Directed by Andrzej Żuławski

Anna: "Goodness is only some kind of reflection upon evil. That's all it is."

With a remake of this movie on the horizon, it was definitely time to see what the fuss was about the original. A movie that wasn't a commercial success upon it's initial release but gained cult status over the years.

To start off with, this doesn't feel like a traditional horror movie about the nature of possession. For the most part, it's very much a kitchen sink drama with a small dose of espionage talk in the mix but even the latter bit felt somewhat muted until the last few minutes of the film.

The focus was on separating couple Mark (Sam Neill) and his dissatisfied wife, Anna (Isabelle Adjani). Their whole relationship was an exercise in pure destruction to watch. If they weren't screaming at each other in nearly every scene together, both of them were physically assaulting each other to boot. It's a bit exhausting at times.

On top of that, they've got a son named Bob (Michael Hogben) that neither make an effort to look after or reassure during their volatile outbursts. Although Mark did try to fight for custody of Bob early in the movie. Also, there was the matter of adultery itself and how it factored into both Mark and Anna's actions.

Mark started an affair with Bob's teacher, Helen. Helen looked exactly like Anna and was even played by the same actor. Anna was also sleeping with Heinrich (Heinz Bennent) but oddly enough, his best scenes were with Mark rather than Anna. Oh and he was eventually killed by Mark.

As for the possession itself, it was a creature driving both Mark and Anna (the latter moreso) into absolute madness. The creature eventually became Mark's doppelganger and by the end of the movie, the volatile couple were no more. In fact, the movie ended on a rather horrifying note.

- The upcoming US remake will be directed by Parker Finn and produced by Robert Pattinson. A Malaysian remake came out in 2024.

- There's a character called Man with Pink Socks, played by Maximilian Rüthlein. I think that's a neat name for a character.

- This film was actually banned in the UK until 1999 and was written while the director was going through a divorce.

- Chronology: 1970s West Berlin for the duration of the movie.

Possession (1981) was something of a wild movie. I don't think I love it but I couldn't keep my eyes off it either. It's such a fascinating look into an absolutely destructive pairing with a very bleak ending. It's definitely a movie that'll stick with you.

Rating: 8 out of 10 

My Review of The Beauty: "Beautiful Billionaires"

 

Written by Ryan Murphy And Matthew Hodgson 

Directed by Alexis Martin Woodall 

Byron (to other billionaires): "Let's get poked."

Who had Vincent D'Onofrio transform into Ashton Kutcher on their bingo card? I didn't but it made sense for such a transformation to have happened. We knew Byron was one of the early candidates for the Beauty.

It was also less of a shocker that other billionaires were roped into Dr Ray's experiment as well. We got to briefly meet Byron's contemporaries Axel Zufo (Peter Gallagher), Waylon Lemming (Billy Eichner), Roland Wylde (David Pittu) and Kitty Munson (Julie Halston). I say briefly because it didn't end well for them.

All of these billionaires took the poke. All of them suddenly became a lot younger but only Byron lived to tell the tale. Why did Byron survive and not the others? Oh, because Byron killed all the other billionaires. Byron's a man who didn't want to share.

I mean he's been pretty vile so far on the show. His lack of concern over his son alienated his wife, Franny. He's also been cheating on her and called her bluff when she wanted to burn everything down. Surely, Franny's going to kill Byron before the season ends, right?

Then there's Cooper and Jordan. It didn't take too long for Jordan to convince Cooper who she was or to fill in the gaps since the last time they saw each other. I'll give Jessica Alexander her due because she's doing a great job matching Rebecca Hall's performance but I still miss the latter as well. Cooper also made the sensible decision to not sleep with Jordan for the time being.

As for The Assassin and Jeremy, well they spent the episode hunting Nate (Matthew Laureano). Eventually they caught up with him. Under Byron's instructions, Nate's corpse was left in Cooper's apartment with that symbol smeared on the wall. I'm not sure why Byron thought that was a bright idea.

- The other billionaires made their money through mining/fossil fuels, cryptocurrency, banking and multinational retail.

- Byron referenced having two sons. Tig is played by Ray Nicholson. Jordan had dodgy contacts get her back into the US.

- Standout music: Christopher Cross's Ride Like The Wind. The Assassin really did convert Jeremy into a fan.

- Chronology: Byron has been transformed for the last few years. Half the episode was his villain origin story.

Beautiful Billionaires filled in some needed blanks about the origin of the Beauty itself. Yup, Byron's horrible as hell and definitely needs to get one massive comeuppance. I would've liked more of Cooper/Jordan but there's always next week.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of Send Help (2026)

 

Written by Damian Shannon And Mark Swift

Directed by Sam Raimi

Linda (to Bradley): "Do you ever hunt? I think I like it."

My second 2026 movie fortunately turned out to be a much better choice, albeit in the same genre. Yes, it's a horror but also a comedy and maybe one of the best movies released so far this year.

Let's take a work trip and throw them on to an island. It'll be like Survivor but with a comedic horror twist. It's also got two people who actively hate each others guts but they're forced to work together in order to survive being stranded on an island together.

The two people being put upon corporate strategist, Linda Liddle (Rachel McAdams) and new CEO Bradley Preston (Dylan O'Brien). The latter's absolute contempt for the former would be his eventual undoing. If there was an employee to antagonise, Linda was the wrong one to go up against.

Bring stranded on the island and a shameless Survivor fan girl, Linda seemed a lot more adept of knowing her surroundings (including poisons) and generally fending for herself. She was also far too good at hunting boar as well. Bradley by contract was useless at the most basic skills to survive.

Another thing that Bradley was useless at was trying to poison Linda and making a boat of his own. There's a scene that echoed Misery in which Linda made it clear to Bradley that her kindness wasn't to be mistaken for weakness. Bradley should've paid more attention to that warning.

Of course as the movie went along, it became clear that Linda was deliberately keeping hervand Bradley away from help. She even killed Bradley's well meaning fiancée Zuri (Edyll Ismail). That poor woman was actually trying to help save them. The final confrontation between Linda and Bradley was brilliant. Both of them showed their absolute worst qualities and only one of them could come out on top. The one who did wasn't surprising.

- Linda had a husband that Bradley accused her of killing. She also had a cockatiel.

- Other cast members in this movie included Dennis Haysbert, Xavier Samuel and even Bruce Campbell (long time collaborator of Sam Raimi) had a photograph appearance.

- Standout music: Blondie's One Way Or Another.

- Chronology: A year passed by the end of the movie.

Fair play to Sam Raimi because he absolutely nailed it with Send Help. I really thought this was a riot. Rachel McAdams and Dylan O'Brien were absolutely brilliant from start to finish. Some genuinely horrifying moments and some really funny ones as well.

Rating: 8 out of 10 

My Review of God's Creatures (2022)

 

Written by Fodhla Cronin O'Reilly And Shane Crowley

Directed by Saela Davis And Anna Rose Holmer

Sarah: "I suppose every house around here has the same ghosts. I wonder how they'd tell them all apart if they came back."

Following the birthday of leading man Paul Mescal, I decided to check one of the few movies of his that I haven't seen before I get to Hamnet later this month. I chose this one. Also, it's an Irish movie and I want to review more of those for this blog.

Set in a remote small Irish fishing village (they never specify where exactly), we've got a young man named Brian O'Hara (Paul Mescal). He's returned from Australia and his mother Aileen (Emily Watson) might be one of the few people actually to see him back.

It's established early in the film that Brian had an antagonistic relationship with his father, Con (Declan Conlon) and Brian himself was also vague about what happened when he was living Down Under. Brian also wanted to revive the family oyster business while Aileen was a manager at a seafood processing plant. 

Then there's Sarah Murphy (Aisling Franciosi). She's experienced marital problems with her husband, Francie (Brendan McCormack) and then she fell faint as a result of the oyster containing fungus. Of course that wasn't the worst part for poor Sarah.

It turned out that Brian assaulted her and Aileen had given him an alibi, which caused a lot of friction in the village. That friction only worsened at the funeral of Aileen's father in law, Paddy (Lalor Roddy). 

Brian's actions negatively impacted both Aileen and Sarah, essentially making them both outcasts in the village. On top of that, Aileen had to deal with the fact that her own son was a rapist and as a result, there's a final comeuppance for Brian that little to make either Aileen or Sarah feel better about themselves.

- A moratorium was declared on Aileen's place of work because of the fungus in the oysters.

- Fungus can cause long term health risks but oddly enough, it doesn't cause food poisoning.

- Standout music: Aisling Franciosi's version of I The Lord Of Sea And Sky was rather nice.

- Chronology: Present day, small Irish fishing village. The movie was shot in Donegal.

A gothic tale, I really liked God's Creatures. An interesting setting with a well handled set of themes. There's top notch performances from Emily Watson, Paul Mescal and Aisling Franciosi.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of A Knight Of The Seven Kingdoms: "The Squire"

 

Written by Hiram Martinez And Annie Julia Wyman And Ira Parker 

Directed by Sarah Adina Smith

Prince Aerion (to Dunk, re Tanselle): "Why did you throw away your life for this whore?"

Well, well, what did we have here? First of all after hints of Prince Aerion being a right little scumbag, this episode really went above and beyond to demonstrate that. Like Joffrey Baratheon and Ramsay Bolton after him, Aerion isn't a man who took a slight lying down.

That's in spite of the fact that his horrible reputation was completely of his own making and the mocking brought upon him by Tanselle was also on him. Personally, I think she went easy on the miserable sod but Aerion retaliated in kind by snapping her finger in front of everyone.

Aerion's attack on Tanselle brought out Dunk's violently protective side. Dunk hasn't been subtle in how he's attracted to Tanselle to the point where Egg teased him for it. It was Egg who also alerted Dunk about Aerion going after Tanselle. Dunk didn't hold back with the punch. Aerion also didn't hold back with trying to punish Dunk either.

Book fans knew the Egg reveal. Yes, he's Aerion's younger brother, Aegon. Yup, the great grandfather of Daenerys Targaryen but that's a long way off. Needless to say, Dunk looked pretty shocked when he realised who Egg really was. Aerion on the other was more annoyed with being reunited with his younger brother.

Dunk and Egg's banter was on absolutely fine form with this episode. They had formed a brotherly bond of sorts and enjoyed mocking one another while enjoying the tournament. That was before everything went shit and Egg's real identity came to the forefront.

I'm actually shocked they didn't leave it until the finale but this midway reveal might actually work better for the show. So far, it's been relatively tame but this reveal was absolutely the best thing that could've happened to the show. Just how will Dunk and Egg's relationship change after this?

- Plummer wanted Dunk to take part in a rigged joust against Lord Ashford's son Ser Androw. Egg also bonded more with the horse Thunder and learned of his future fate.

- Did Dunk and Egg invent the breakfast sandwich? It looked really nice. 

- The next episode will be released on HBO Max on Friday due to the Super Bowl on Sunday.

- Chronology: We've been in the same place for the first half of the season. 

The Squire was by far the best episode so far. Devoid of unnecessary bowel movements, genuinely fun banter with our leads and that reveal at the end. This was the shot in the arm the show needed and it came at the right time as well.

Rating: 8 out of 10 

My Review of Atlantis: The Lost Empire (2001)

 

Written by Kirk Wise And Gary Trousdale And Joss Whedon And Bryce Zabel And Jackie Zabel And Tab Murphy

Directed by Gary Trousdale And Kirk Wise

Milo (to himself): "Okay, Milo, don't take no for an answer. "Look, I have some questions for you, and I'm not leaving this city until they're answered!" Yeah, th-that's it. That's good. That's good."

Would you believe there are some Disney movies I have never seen? Well this was one of them until last night. I thought I'd correct that by actually sitting down to watch this one. I do like an underwater adventure and this one had it's moments.

Focusing on a linguist and cartographer named Milo James Thatch (Michael J. Fox), this movie had our main character with a mission in mind. Milo was determined to find the lost empire of Atlantis. The only problem was that no one wanted to indulge Milo's flight of fancy.

That was until Milo encountered an eccentric millionaire named Preston B. Whitmore (John Mahoney). He was a friend of Milo's grandfather and not only gave Milo the means to go underwater to find Atlantis but he also gave Milo a crew with the relevant skill set to aid Milo's quest.

The crew in question included demolition expert Vincenzo "Vinny" Santorini (Don Novello), Dr. Joshua Strongbear Sweet (Phil Morris), Commander Lyle Tiberius Rourke (James Garner), mechanic Audrey Rocio Ramirez (Jacqueline Obradors), radio operator/photographer Wilhelmina Bertha Packard (Florence Stanley), chef Jebidiah Allardyce "Cookie" Farnsworth (Jim Carney), geologist Gaetan "Mole" Molière (Corey Burton) and Lieutenant Helga Katrina Sinclair (Claudia Christian). Yup, that's a lot of characters to keep up with.

On top of that, there's also Atlantis being real itself and Milo and the crew making themselves known to it's King Kashekim Nedakh (Leonard Nimoy) and his daughter, Kida (Cree Summer). There's a bubbling romance between Milo and Kida but there's also treachery afoot when it turned out that the crew only wanted to discover Atlantis for selfish reasons and posed an actual threat to the underwater empire.

From a visual perspective, Atlantis looked great onscreen but it's definitely lacking on two fronts. One the romance between Milo and Kida was by far one of the least convincing and poorly set up and two, the villains of the piece were poorly handled. Both things don't ruin the movie but they are disappointing nonetheless.

- David Ogden Stiers had a brief role as Fenton Q. Harcourt. He didn't support Milo's endeavours. There's a sequel named Atlantis: Milo's Return (2003).

- The Atlantean language developed in the movie was by Marc Okrand. He also developed the Klingon language for Star Trek.

- Standout music: Mya's Where The Dream Takes You.

- Chronology: 1914 Washington, D.C. and Atlantis.

For the most part, I did like Atlantis: The Lost Empire. It's just the unconvincing romance and poor villains somewhat let it down as a movie. It's not bad, just average to be honest.

Rating: 6 out of 10