My Review of Kiss Of The Spider Woman (2025)

 

Written And Directed by Bill Condon

Valentin: "I'm sorry to break the news but nobody sings in real life."

Luis: "Well, maybe they should."

There are times when a movie comes out and bombs so badly that you have to watch to see if it's that bad. Then you find out it's actually, which made the fact that it bombed even more mystifying. This would be such a movie.

Okay, I can think of a few reasons for it's box office failure. It's very political in a climate where audiences are vastly preferring less of that, it's very queer themed and let's be honest, I'm not sure October was the right month to release such a movie.

Now let's gets to the positives because there's plenty of them Tobe had. The biggest one being Tonatiuh. Cast in the role of informer Luis Molina, he's placed in a cell with political prisoner Valentin Arregui (Diego Luna) to uncover some vital information. Needless to say, it's not an easy task for Luis.

Mainly because both Luis and Valentin are like chalk and cheese. One's a proud and flamboyant gay man with a traditional mindset towards women and the other's a straight man with a girlfriend named Marta (Josefina Scaglione) and a more modern mindset towards women. The latter's also not a fan of musicals, which posed another challenge for Luis.

Throughout the movie, Luis regaled Valentin with the story called The Kiss Of The Spider Woman. It was mixed in with other tales, had a love quadrangle of sorts involving Kendell Nesbitt (Tonatiuh), Armando (Diego Luna) and in dual roles, there was Jennifer Lopez as both Ingrid Luna and Aurora. Oh and she was the Spider Woman, who unsurprisingly symbolised death. Her kiss was inevitable.

The musical numbers popped on-screen as the growing closeness between both Luis and Valentin intensified and the Warden (Bruno Bichir) tried to drive a wedge between the pair of them. On the plus side, we got a lovely and tender romance between Luis and Valentin but also one mired in tragedy when Luis's freedom came at a horrible price.

- I agreed with a lot of the things that Luis said but dissing Meryl Streep might have been a step too far.

- This isn't the first attempt of a live action version of this movie. There was another that came out in 1985.

- Standout music: Her Name Is Aurora, I Will Dance Alone, An Everyday Man, I Do Miracles, Anything For Him and Kiss Of The Spider Woman.

- Chronology: May to October 1983 at the tail end of the Dirty War in Argentina.

Kiss Of The Spider Woman definitely deserved better as a movie. It's a genuinely good movie with excellent performances from Jennifer Lopez and Diego Luna. However it's also a brilliant showcase for Tonatiuh, who absolutely stole the show here. He gave one of the most charismatic performances this year. I'd actually recommend seeing this while I find the 1985 version.

Rating: 8 out of 10