My Review of American Horror Story: 13 - Sisters In Arms

 

Written by Ned Martel And Charlie Carver 

Directed by Gillian Robespierre 

Fiona: "I think you'll understand when I say I can't believe my eyes."

Constance: "Nor can I."

I certainly can't believe what this episode tried and failed to pull off. I knew we were going to get some convoluted nonsense in which Fiona Goode and Constance Langdon would be suddenly related but talk about messing it up badly here.

I could maybe believe in Fiona and Constance being twin sisters but the two of them sharing a mother in Sister Jude Martin from Asylum? This felt like the show was taking the piss. It's just horrible writing and bad continuity to seasons past. There was also no need for Jude to be a sexual assault victim of the Devil.

I'll admit that I did like Myrtle being the one to break the news to Fiona and also the one to introduce Fiona and Constance and give them some alone time together. That was considerate of Myrtle. Fiona and Constance had a lot to discuss but the latter's resentment over having no magic annoyed me. I like that Fiona didn't let Constance blame her for that.

When we weren't indulging in the sisterly reunion, Ben realised that time was of the essence in order to defeat his father. Both Cordelia and Marie looked like they wanted to gag Ben but instead, Ben made himself useful and plucked Queenie out of Hell. Ben might be getting used to his powers but he's certainly enjoying the perks of taking trips into Hell without any consequences for him.

Anyways, I was glad to see Queenie back on Earth but Marie's OTT way of explaining a plan to defeat Mr. Nas was one of those scenes that went on too long. I also knew that it was a plan that was going to go horribly wrong once Cordelia, Queenie and Ben headed back to the Apollyon to carry out the plan.

It had to go wrong, didn't it? They made a point of Nas being able to read Ben's mind and Ben got knocked out yet again. On top of that, we had Queenie being strangled by Rubber Man and Cordelia being stabbed by Mr. Phibes. It should've made for a gripping cliffhanger but it felt a bit flat.

- Where the Hell were Madison, Mallory, Coco, Myrtle, Fiona and Constance during Marie's big plan discussion?

- Queenie is considering moving to New York after the Coven defeat Satan. I really do feel like this show has to deplete the Coven next week. 

- Pepper got a mention when Nas was tormenting Jude but not an appearance. I wish this episode did a better job in showing why Constance is only now going against Mr. Nas.

- Ben acted like the events of the previous episode didn't happen. There was no continuity on him and Madison.

- Marie almost seem to have more respect now that she was made aware of Cordelia's true lineage.

- Chronology: From where the previous episode left off. 

Sisters In Arms was a poor penultimate episode that not even three different performances from Jessica Lange could save it. I've been a big defender of this season but there's no getting away from how much of an actual mess it's become as we head towards the finale. Can the last episode bring this together? I hate to say it but it's not looking likely.

Rating: 5 out of 10

My Review of American Horror Story: 13 - Madison's Happy Ending

 

Written by Ned Martel And Charlie Carver And Ryan Murphy 

Directed by Adam Penn

Ben (to the Coven): "Trust me, I am not the Devil that you know. I'm the Devil you need."

Every once in a while, a show you love will produce an episode so devastatingly stupid, you'll almost feel embarrassed for liking said show to begin with. This was that very episode and being so close to the finale, it made it so much more headache inducing.

All season long, something has felt off about Madison Montgomery as a character. It's like instead of coming up with new iconic lines organically for her, the show was forcing them, with none of them remotely landing. Even the revised "Surprise bitch" line earlier in the season was a low for Madison.

However, the writing for her in this episode bordered on outright misogyny. Since when was Madison a romcom Princess? And while I do like the idea of Ben being a dream Prince, this episode spectacularly failed to deliver on it's mawkish premise. We're at the tail end of defeating Satan. We didn't have time for this.

I'll give Joey Pollari and Emma Roberts some credit for trying to make Ben and Madison work but not enough to justify the amount of time the episode wasted trying to develop a relationship between the two. Yes, Madison fell in love with Ben but did he fall back in love with her? He certainly liked spending time with her but you're not given the perspective they were on the same page romantically. 

Oddly enough, Ben's best scenes were with the Coven. He started the episode being threatened with castration but plucking Myrtle Snow (Frances Conroy) out of retail Hell certainly earned him some brownie points. I don't think the season needed Myrtle back but I'll never say no to seeing more of Frances Conroy and Cordelia couldn't hide her joy in Myrtle being back.

While I've enjoyed the nice boy Ben more than most people, this bad boy version who wants to do good is actually enjoyable. I love that Ben is going the opposite route to Michael Langdon (who I also loved) and now that Ben's tapped into his demon side, he's gotten that tiny bit more sexier to boot. Funny that.

- I knew Ashley was going to be a goner but Ben killing her by accident I didn't expect. Good riddance though.

- Myrtle really did just get a variation of Madison's personal Hell until Ben stepped in to get her. Frances Conroy's name has been added to the opening credits. 

- Ben started the season disapproving of Constance smoking and now, he's enjoying a post sex smoke with Madison. He looked gorgeous in that grey suit on their date.

- Mallory had the most hostility for Ben out of all the witches whereas Coco was charmed by him.

- The references to Julia Roberts, the need for a baby, the gay gynaecologist. I hated all of these scenes that involved Madison. It felt like a different show and not a good one.

- Chronology: From where the previous episode left off.

I don't think the show has produced an episode as spectacularly bad as Madison's Happy Ending. It's genuinely the worst episode of American Horror Story in it's thirteen season history. The Madison/Ben plot was a classic case of "too little, too late" for this sort of pairing and quite frankly, I'd be more happy to see them break up by the finale. Let it be a doomed romance.

Rating: 4 out of 10

My Review of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)

 

Written by Kim Henkel And Tobe Hooper

Directed by Tobe Hooper 

Hitchhiker: "My family's always been in meat."

For the month of Halloween, I knew I was going to get around to this one. Yeah, it's not a Halloween movie but it's an iconic horror movie (with a lot of mediocre to bad sequels) that I haven't covered on this blog until now.

There's five teenagers -  Sally Hardesty (Marilyn Burns), Jerry (Allen Danziger), Pam (Teri McMinn), Kirk (William Vail), and Sally's brother Franklin (Paul A. Partain), who was a paraplegic. These characters were our protagonists but most were also fodder when they made the mistake of picking up a hitchhiker (Edwin Neal).

As the film would reveal, this wasn't an ordinary hitchhiker. He was Nubbins Sawyer and he was unstable and a cannibal to boot. The rest of the Sawyer family weren't exactly model citizens either. Drayton (Jim Siedow), Grandpa (John Dugan) and of course, there's Leatherface (Gunnar Hansen) himself.

Leatherface undoubtedly became the most memorable member of the Sawyer clan. He was handy with a chainsaw, physically intimidating and rather slow witted. He made for a truly terrifying presence but also was the most tragic member of that family.

As the movie went along, all of the teenagers suffered at the hands of the Sawyer clan and they suffered brutally. Sally of course was shaped as the Final Girl but she's not the type that most expect these days.

Sally barely survived this movie as she went through absolute hell seeing her friends and brother die, losing a finger and being tortured by the Sawyers. I can't say she's one of my favourite Final Girls but it's hard not to feel for her throughout this film.

- Parts of this movie were influenced by the real life crimes of Ed Gein and Elmer Wayne Henley.

- John Larroquette did the narration for this film.

- Standout music: Roger Bartlett and Friends Fool For A Blonde.

- Chronology: Set in 1973 in the fictional town of Newt, Muerto County, Texas. 

I'll admit that I'm not as enamored with The Texas Chainsaw Massacre as many horror fans but I do like this first movie and Leatherface made for a terrifying presence with the screen time he's had.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of Gerald's Game (2017)

 

Written by Mike Flanagan And Jeff Howard

Directed by Mike Flanagan 

Jessie: "This monster was real, real as they come. As real as the cuffs, as the dog. As real as the eclipse."

It came to my attention that I had missed something out in my overall viewing of Mike Flanagan's filmography. Yup, there was this Netflix adaptation of a Stephen King book in movie form, featuring some of his regular players.

In this movie, you've got Carla Gugino and Bruce Greenwood. They're a married couple named Jessie and Gerald Burlingame. Their marriage was on the rock and a weekend away at a lake house was needed to get things back on track for the pair.

Throw in a bit of roleplay, bondage and a scenario that Jessie was growing increasingly uncomfortable with and it appeared that both her and Gerald had much bigger problems to deal with head on. Then Gerald had a heart attack and died at the worst possible time.

For the majority of this film, Jessie's handcuffed to a bed with her dead husband on top of her, a dog that alternated between friendly and feral and worse than that, Jessie's past. With no rescue in sight, she spent a lot of time taking a trip down memory lane while being confined to a bed.

In flashbacks her younger self (Chiara Aurelia) had siblings named Maddie (Adalyn Jones) and James (Bryce Harper) that she wasn't as close to. Jessie also wasn't close to her mother Sally (Kate Siegel) but she was also a victim of abuse at the hands of her father, Tom (Henry Thomas).

Yes, Jessie's past with her father isn't that dissimilar to what Stephen King previously tackled in Dolores Claiborne but there's also the addition of the sinister Moonlight Man aka Raymond Andrew Joubert (Carel Struycken). The character's menacing enough but felt rather underdeveloped in this particular adaptation. 

- There's also a plot with the eclipse in flashbacks. Jessie hallucinates versions of herself and Gerald talking to her.

- Carla Gugino would work with Henry Thomas and Kate Siegel a year later in The Haunting Of Hill House.

- Standout music: Sam Cooke's Bring It On Home To Me.

- Chronology: Set in Fairhope, Alabama with a six month jump towards the end of the film.

I can't say I really dug Gerald's Game as an adaptation. It's fine I suppose. Carla Gugino did give a good performance as did Bruce Greenwood but it's themes have explored better in other works by both Stephen King and Mike Flanagan respectively.

Rating: 6 out of 10 

Glee - Reboot Ordered By Hulu/Disney+

 

Last month, I reported that Ryan Murphy had planned a reboot of Glee and now, a month later, it's been confirmed that Hulu and Disney+ have ordered a revival series for the popular musical drama that ran for six seasons on FOX, between 2009 to 2015.

As of now, it's early days and no cast members have been announced but chances are, we'll know exactly who'll be involved over the next few weeks. Not sure how I feel about this tbh.

Press Release: https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/tv/tv-news/glee-revival-series-disney-plus-hulu-1236736950/

Glee is available to watch on Hulu and Disney+

My Review of Crystal Lake - Season 1 (2026, Peacock Series)

 

Written by Bryan Fuller And Brad Caleb Kane And Jen Silverman And Pia Wilson And Evan Endicott And Josh Stoddard And Karl Taro Greenfeld And Laura Marks And Arthur Imperatore

Directed by Michael Lennox And Celine Held And Logan George And Quyen Tran

Pamela (to Levon): "I don't want to heal. I just want to find my son." 

It's certainly been a month for horror and we've still got a week and a half left before Halloween itself. When it comes to horror franchise, I'm not gonna lie - Friday The 13th can often be very hit and miss for me.

If you think of this eight part series from Peacock as an alternative prequel to the popular horror franchise, you may like it a lot more. Even if you don't, the question would be - is it any worse than the sequels we've had? I'd argue it's better than most of the sequels.

For instance, it's biggest strength would be Linda Cardellini. The decision to cast her as Pamela Voorhees by far was the best thing the show did. She's more perfect from start to finish. A woman with a shady past, all she wanted to do was to provide a loving environment for her son, Jason (Callum Vinson/Jonathan Tison). Taking him to Camp Crystal would end up being her biggest mistake.

The opening episode didn't waste time in killing Jason off due to hedonistic counsellors Barry (Phoenix Parnevik) and Claudette (Danielle Kotch) being more into each other than doing their jobs. Of course, there's a twist to Jason's origins and even his death and aftermath.

Jason had made a friend in a girl named Grace (Gwend Sundstrom) and she's a major player in the show. She came from a crappy home with an abusive mother named Valerie (Tonya Glanz), who'd get one gruesome death upon annoying Pamela. Anyways, Grace witnessed Barry and Claudette failing Jason and she's part of their big death scene in the fifth episode wheb it should've been Pamela's moment alone.

Then there's Jason's origins itself. Pamela being involved with Elias Wittering (Hamish Linklater) saw Jason being a product of a scientific experiment that was supposed to test human endurance. Bellflower are the villains of the season and it only took the finale for the family reunion from Hell.

Keeping in with Pamela's chaotic world, there was a slew of decent supporting characters. Pamela had allies with Chief Levon Brooks (William Catlett) and his reporter sister, Briana (Devin Kessler). Levon was also a love interest for Pamela while Rita (Joy Suprano) and Officer Dorf (Cameron Scoggins) had their moments as did the reclusive Ralph (Nick Cordileone).

Episode titles are Camp Crystal, Part 2, Part III, A New Beginning, The New Blood, Kill Them Mommy, Friday and The Final Chapter.

- I liked that the title sequence evoked many of the title sequences from the movie.

- Pamela wore her iconic blue sweater in the fifth and sixth episodes. Some of her lines were reworked a bit.

- The last scene with Steve Christy (Dan Thompson) talking to the campers about Jason as the latter watched them.

- Standout music: Harry Manfredini provided the theme but the composer for the series was Giosuè Greco.

- Chronology: 1971 in Crystal Lake. The seventh episode was set in Houston.

Crystal Lake isn't a perfect prequel to Friday The 13th but it's a damn sight better than expected, although it's more of an alternative version tbh. Linda Cardellini delivers one of the best performances on TV/streaming this year and there's some rather great kills. 

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of 3 From Hell (2019)

 

Written And Directed by Rob Zombie 

Otis: "Hello America. Did you miss me?"

The last two days I watched and reviewed the first two installments of Rob Zombie's Firefly trilogy and now I'm at the very end of said trilogy. It's certainly been a bumpy set of movies.

After the second film, there was an uncertainty towards the fates of Baby (Sheri Moon Zombie), Otis (Bill Moseley) and Captain Spaulding (Sid Haig). It turned out that they got caught, gained public support but still ended up serving life sentences.

Because Rob Zombie clearly had a thing for those exploitation prison movies, there's some emphasis on Baby's prison time. Yup, she got to be subjected to a rough time, dealing with characters like Greta (Dee Wallace) and Slackjaw (Dot Marie Jones) before she's eventually freed.

Spaulding didn't fare as well as he was given lethal injection off screen while Winslow Foxworth "Foxy" Coltrane (Richard Brake) helped break both Otis (his half brother) and Baby out of the slammer. Foxy also replaced Spaulding in this depraved line up of main characters.

Anyways the trio ended up in Mexico and it's a place where they partied and even bond with some of the locals. Baby in particular had a nice connection with Sebastian (Pancho Moler) and this film managed to give us a character slightly worse than the Firefly clan.

Yup, Aquarius (Emilio Rivera) and his men wanted to take Baby, Otis and Foxy out and they very nearly succeeded. For a family as evil as the Firefly clan, it's almost a miracle that I was rooting for them against Aquarius. Of course they were victorious. I wasn't expecting otherwise.

- Sid Haig died before this movie's release, hence the addition of Foxy to the family.

- Danny Trejo appeared in the previous film and also appeared in this one.

- Standout music: Suzi Quatro's The Wild One.

- Chronology: Ten years since the events of the second film.

3 From Hell marked an okay ending to a generally okay trilogy of films surrounding a pretty nasty family. Probably not a trilogy I'll revisit but could've been worse.

Rating: 6 out of 10 

My Review of Twice-Told Tales (1963)

Written by Robert E. Kent 

Directed by Sidney Salkow

Beatrice: "Your daughter is a fine specimen, too, isn't she father? A specimen of the most deadly thing that was ever given life."

My need to watch Vincent Price horror films this month has extended beyond Poe adaptations. I caught up with this gem last night,which saw him tackling three different roles.

The movie might called Twice -Told Tales but there's actually three of them, based on some rather infamous stories. In each of them, Price had something of an antagonistic role to play.

The first one was Dr. Heidegger's Experiment, in which Price was Alex Medborne. Both him and his friend, Dr. Carl Heidegger (Sebastian Cabot). They're celebrating the latter's 79th birthday and were playing around with water that had preservation properties. It was enough to make both men young.

It was also enough to resurrect Heidegger's fiancée, Sylvia (Mari Blanchard), who's been dead for 38 years. Throw in a very toxic love triangle between the three and this segment saw no one getting out alive as the water only temporarily restored people.

The second one was the best. A take on Rappaccini's Daughter, this one had Price as Giancomo, who kept his daughter, Beatrice (Joyce Taylor) prisoner in a poisonous garden. Beatrice herself too was poisonous but also in love with university student, Giovanni (Brett Halsey).

Giacomo was desperate to keep both Beatrice and Giovanni away from one another but then infected Giovanni in order for his daughter to have her lover. Again, none of the characters from this one made it out alive.

The last story, The House of the Seven Gables was the weakest of the bunch but still pretty decent. Price took on the role of Gerald Pyncheon. Both Gerald and his wife Alice (Beverly Garland) return to the former's family home and it's a home with it's own secrets and lies.

There's also a family curse, which involved Jonathan Maulle (Richard Denning), who was a descendant of the original curse maker. Throw in a rivalry between Gerald and his sister, Hannah (Jacqueline deWit), attempted murder and the collapse of a family home and it's a suitable ending for this anthology.

- There's a comic book version of this movie that you can enjoy.

- Vincent Price previously played Clifford Pyncheon in the 1940 version of The House Of The Seven Gables.

- I liked the skeleton hand used to turn the page on each story.

- Chronology: 1859 for the first story, Padua for the second story and the 19th century for the final story.

Twice-Told Tales told three different stories, all of which Vincent Price at the helm. They're good stories with the middle one being the best of the bunch.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of House Of Usher (1960)

 

Written by Richard Matheson 

Directed by Roger Corman 

Narration: "And the deep and dark tarn closed silently over the fragments of the House of Usher - Poe."

I did say that I wasn't going to review these Vincent Price/Roger Corman adaptations of Edgar Allen Poe stories in order, so I went back a few movies to review this one.

A couple of years, I really enjoyed the Netflix adaptation of this particular story and this version also turned out to be very enjoyable too. As usual, Vincent Price would turn in a fantastic performance.

In this adaptation, he's Roderick Usher and he comes from a cursed family bloodline. As a consequence of that, he's incredibly overprotective of his sister, Madeline (Myrna Fahey). This was something that didn't go down well with her betrothed, Philip Winthrop (Mark Damon).

In fact despite Roderick and even the butler, Bristol (Harry Ellerbe) trying to warn Philip about the cursed bloodline and the madness, Philip wouldn't take any warning to mind. He was determined to bring Madeline back to America with him. Of course, fate had other ideas for her.

She suffered from catalepsy and was buried alive. She got out of her coffin and went absolutely mad and ended her own bloodline along with Bristol. It's a very brutal but suitable ending for this incredibly dysfunctional family.

Of course, it's more devastating for Philip. All he wanted was to be with Madeline and didn't get to have that. It's a very bittersweet ending but fitting in consideration to the source material.

- This was the first of these eight movies. I've got four more of these to go.

- The opening and ending credits had a nice smoky colour effect.

- The film also went by the title of The Fall Of The House Of Usher.

- Chronology: The Usher manor was in the worst place near a murky swamp.

House Of Usher is a glorious adaptation of the source material. Note perfect performances from the three leads, superb direction and cinematography. 

Rating: 8 out of 10 

My Review of The Devil's Rejects (2005)

 

Written And Directed by Rob Zombie

Otis: "I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work."

Yesterday I wrote my review for House Of 1000 Corpses. That film struck a chord that a sequel came out two years later. The focus being on the Firefly family and the absolute carnage that they caused.

Mostly, the focus was on Baby (Sheri Moon Zombie), Otis Driftwood (Bill Moseley) and Captain Spaulding (Sid Haig). Their antics from the previous film had the law going after them, in particular the rather overzealous and excessively violent Sheriff John Quincey Wydell (William Forsythe).

The film quickly killed off Rufus (Tyler Mane) while taking Mother Firefly (Leslie Easterbrook) into custody and the latter absolutely revelled in being as vile to Wydell as best she could. She even took delight in reminding Wydell that her family were responsible for the death of his brother George (Tom Towles). Let's just say that Mother seriously underestimated how psychotic Wydell really was.

Don't get me wrong - the Firefly are psychotic scumbags who deserve to die but it's like this movie tried to make them sympathetic by making Wydell as unhinged as they are. When Baby, Spaulding and Otis are captured, it's almost sweet seeing them trying to protect each other. Even Tiny (Matthew McGrory) saving Baby was an oddly sweet moment.

Then there's the fact that for no reason whatsoever, the on the run Firefly family randomly target a family - husband and wife Roy (Geoffrey Lewis) and Gloria Sullivan (Priscilla Barnes) along with their daughter, Wendy (Kate Norby) son in law Adam (Lew Temple) and roadie Jimmy Cracker (Brian Posehn). None of those people deserve what they're subjected to and none of them made it out of the movie alive either.

The Firefly family really do spend this movie adding victims, enemies and even allies into their twisted world. The ending being one drawn out car chase with their fate left unknown would've been a decent way of closing this family out but a third movie would come out fourteen years later. 

- Wydell gets angry about a lot of things and disrespecting Elvis Presley was one of them.

- Characters from the Groucho's were used as aliases here. Not surprised the Firefly family kept photos of their victims.

- Standout music: Lynyrd Skynyrd's Free Bird.

- Chronology: Took place during May 18th 1978.

The Devil's Rejects has some horrible moments and a racist chant that even in 2005 should've been removed but it's a solid enough expansion on the Firefly family and the people that crossed their path in this one.

Rating: 6 out of 10 

My Review of The Masque Of The Red Death (1964)

 

Written by Charles Beaumont And R. Wright Campbell

Directed by Roger Corman 

Red Death (to Prospero): "Why should you be afraid to die? Your soul has been dead for a long long time."

I'm continuing with my Vincent Price/Roger Corman Edgar Allen Poe and not strictly in order. I went for this one yesterday as I do like Price in villain mode and he's pretty dastardly here.

It's medieval Italy and Price in this film was cast as Satanic Prince Prospero. He's a mean spirited bastard who took delight in burning down a village as an old woman who had the Red Death (aka anthrax) died. On top of that, Prospero's ways of dealing with villagers also left a lot to be desired.

He's smitten with village girl Francesca (Jane Asher) and took her prisoner. He also Francesca's lover Gino (David Weston) and her father, Ludovico (Nigel Green) prisoner too. Prospero spent some of the movie trying to get Gino and Ludovico to kill one another and when he couldn't, he came up with a plan to cause despair to both men and Francesca.

Satanism played a huge role in this film. Prospero was a devout follower of the Dark Lord and wanted everyone to know that. His mistress Juliana (Hazel Court) took her devotion a further step in proving herself worthy. Let's just say she got married but not in a way that I'd recommend to anyone.

There's also the presence of the ghastly Alfredo (Patrick McGee). His abuse of dwarf girl Esmeralda (Verina Greenlaw) brought out the vengeful side of her lover, Hop-Toad (Skip Martin) and he's given quite the comeuppance. It's really satisfying to watch if I'm being honest.

Of course what was also satisfying was the reveal of Red Death himself and how he factored into the downfall of Prospero. It's beautifully depicted with a great dual performance from Vincent Price. The ending as well with the other cloaked figure was suitably chilling.

- The cloaked figures were white (Tuberculosis), yellow (Yellow Fever), orange (Scurvy), blue (Cholera), violet (Influenza), and black (Bubonic Plague). 

- Corman wanted to adapt this story as it was his favourite after House Of Usher (1960).

- Hop-Toad and Esmeralda appeared in the short story, Hop-Frog but were added to this adaptation 

- Chronology: Medieval Italy for the entire movie.

The Masque Of The Red Death is a fabulous adaptation of the source material with Vincent Price truly playing such a reprehensible prince. There's something truly satisfying in watching Prospero's comeuppance play out and the final scene gave chills.

Rating: 8 out of 10 

My Review of House Of 1000 Corpses

 

Written And Directed by Rob Zombie 

Otis: "It's all true. The bogeyman is real and you found him."

It's less than a fortnight to Halloween and I found myself revisiting this one late last night. It's the first in a trilogy centred on a depraved family of serial killers and a taste of the kind of filmmaker that Rob Zombie would turn out to be.

I'll admit that Zombie's tastes are often trashy for my liking and there's definitely moments in this film that I found pretty cringe in pastts but as a debut, it's not without it's merit.

Our unfortunate victims are a group consisting of Jerry Goldsmith (Chris Hardwick), Bill Hudley (Rainn Wilson), Mary Knowles (Jennifer Jordyn), and Denise Willis (Erin Daniels). They chose Halloween of all nights to go and explore the legend of Dr. Satan (Walter Phelan). Local clown Captain Spaulding (Sid Haig) took delight in messing with them. He'd also be the least of their problems.

Having the misfortune of encountering the rather foul mouthed Baby Firefly (Sheri Moon Zombie) would put these four into severe harm's way. If Baby was too much to handle, then the rest of her family - Mother Firefly (Karen Black), adopted brother Otis Driftwood (Bill Moseley), half brother Tiny (Matthew McGrory), Rufus (Robert Allen Mukesh) and Grandpa Hugo (Dennis Fimple) would only make things so much worse.

We're barely halfway into the film where the Firefly family have kidnapped and terrorised cheerleaders, murdered cops and turned Bill into a grotesque Fiji Mermaid and they almost got off easily. Jerry, Mary and Denise have their suffering prolonged as the Firefly family upped the sadism and even revealed the true story behind Dr. Satan.

This isn't a movie where a survivor would emerge. Mary got brutally stabbed and Jerry ended up being vivisected. Denise almost escaped until she didn't and her fate at the hands of Dr Satan and Earl (Jake McKinnon) sure as Hel looked bleak as anything.

- Although it was necessary to the film, I did find the cutting to the film bits rather annoying at times.

- The movie would spawn two very different sequels in The Devil's Rejects and 3 From Hell that would expand on the Firefly family.

- Standout music: Rob Zombie's Everybody Scream!

- Chronology: October 30th and 31st 1977.

House Of 1000 Corpses certainly set the bar for the aesthetic Rob Zombie would go for as a director. There's moments of brilliance, there's a homage to grislier horror of old and certain moments that you'd question the man's taste but it's a rather good debut nonetheless.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of Psycho Beach Party (2000)

 

Written by Charles Busch

Directed by Robert Lee King

Florence: "I've never been to an orgy before. What do I wear?"

I'm half way through October and I'm trying to keep this blog as horror themed as possible. I'm also using this as an opportunity to catch up with old horror films that I've not seen before. This would be one of them.

Pre-Six Feet Under, I was aware that this movie was a cult favourite that had Lauren Ambrose playing the main role of Florence "Chicklet" Forrest. Its a pretty interesting role for her as Chicklet turned out to be a rather multifaceted character.

As Florence, she was kind of unpopular with only Berdine (Danni Wheeler) as her only friend. As Chicklet, she was the only girl in a surfer gang. Her presence in said attracted the attention of both Starcat (Nicholas Brendon) and the much older Kanaka (Thomas Gibson). Though the latter was more attracted to the fiery Ann Bowman.

Yes, Florence suffered from multiple personalities and her others ones were playful, violent and snobbish, much to the confusion of everyone around her. Except her mother, Ruth (Beth Broderick), who knew more about Florence's psyche than she was letting on.

Anyways there was a spate of murders throughout the community and it really did look like Florence was responsible. Of course, it turns out that the mild manner Lars (Matt Kesslar) was the real killer and it's a good rug pull moment until the ending also turned things on its head.

The film's filled with some vibrant characters. You get typical mean girl types like Rhonda (Kathleen Robertson) and Marvel Ann (Amy Adams) but the standouts were Captain Monica Stark (Charles Busch) and B horror movie actress, Bettina Barnes (Kimberley Davies). Both characters light up the movie with their scenes.

- There's a slew of hunky actors in Nicholas D'Agosto, David Chokachi and Andrew Levitas to name a few.

- Florence had a younger brother who died when she was looking after him. The Ann Bowman persona was a nod to Ruth's promiscuity.

- Standout music: Ben Vaughn's P-S-Y-C-H-O (Psycho).

- Chronology: This seemed to have a very 1950s feel to it overall.

Psycho Beach Party might be one of the strangest movies I've watched in a while and it's not even a new one. It mostly worked but some stuff didn't quite land. Lauren Ambrose unquestionably was the best thing about this film.

Rating: 6 out of 10 

My Review of American Horror Story: 13 - The Prodigal Son

 

Written by Ned Martel And Charlie Carver And Brad Falchuk

Directed by Gillian Robespierre 

Mr. Nas (to Ben): "So, are we going to do this nicely or is daddy gonna have to give you a spanking?"

Personally, I'm disappointed that Ben didn't get a spanking in this episode and I don't apologise for that. All of a sudden, our mild mannered hospice caretaker developed a bratty sub side to him and all because his daddy turned out to be Satan of all things.

Yes, Ben is the son of Mr. Nas but as I suspected, he's not Devan Campbell from the events of Apocalypse. If he were, this would've been the place to have confirmed that. Ben basically had daddy drag him around the Apollyon and bind him to a chair without the bondage aspect of it all. 

I'm going to blunt here. Joey Pollari and Paul Anthony Kelly found their best scene partners this season in each other that it's almost a shame Ben and Nas are related. There was a time when these two would've played enemies who hate fucked each other. Sadly that's not this time. Oh, well.

Mr. Nas was pretty blatant about wanting Ben to join the family business. Now, this was where the episode lost me. Nas's big plan all along was to go back to Hell and let Ben take over the Earth. That seemed really dumb. Surely, Nas would want to rule both Hell and Earth and keep Ben under control. Going by the way this episode ended, I can't tell what Ben has chosen to do.

Ben conveniently appeared at the Academy during the end, offering himself to the witches who only just learned he existed. Is he going to be a Trojan horse and destroy the witches from the inside? I can't rule it out. Or will Ben actually rebel against Daddy Dearest and help them send Nas back to Hell and relinquish any claim to ruling Earth? Ben did talk about wanting to do good.

Am I terrible person for saying that anything Coven related was my least favourite aspect of this one? I didn't miss them in the last episode and while their screen time was essential, I kept wanting to go back to Ben and Mr. Nas. On the plus side, at least everyone found out about Mallory taking out Michael Langdon and reacted accordingly. Cordelia in particular handled the reveal a lot better than expected.

- I can't wait for Ben to find out that Constance is his half sister. I wonder how he'll take that bit of news.

- If you thought Ben's overuse of AI was bad, then some of Nas's choice in dialogue was a lot worse by comparison.

- Ben has shown no actual powers whatsoever for someone being earmarked to rule Earth. How come Michael did?

- I did slightly laugh at Coco's offering of Captain Morgan's to Papa Legba and Madison having to be the rational one after the big reveals this episode.

- Standout music: Fleurie's Sirens at the end of the episode.

- Chronology: From the previous episode left off. Also a 1939 Vatican flashback where Pope Pius XII learned about the Antichrist from the box.

The Prodigal Son might have somewhat disappointed with Mr. Nas's overall plan being rather idiotic and almost destined for failure but I had fun watching him and Ben get to know each other. Joey Pollari and Paul Anthony Kelly had some good moments together. I really hope these last three episodes can bring the whole thing to a satisfying conclusion.

Rating: 7 out of 10

My Review of American Horror Story: 13 - The Devil Is In The Details

 

Written by Ryan Murphy And Ned Martel And Charlie Carver

Directed by Adam Penn

Constance: "Why the fuck did you choose me?"

Mr Nas: "I always knew this moment would come."

An episode of two halves with two characters linked by two other characters to boot. First, let's talk about Constance Langdon, shall we? She's been more than happy to serve Mr. Nas aka Satan himself, but it's now that she's starting to have doubts.

It's less to do with the moral implications of serving the Devil himself and more to do with the fact that Constance felt she was continuing a pattern of following influential men who she was smarter than. Constance believing that she's smarter than the Devil himself felt on brand enough. Even Mr. Nas could see the funny side in Constance's assertion.

Nas for the majority of this episode was played by both Fedor Steer and Paul Anthony Kelly. The latter got to wine and dine Constance whilst dressed as a matinee idol. Nas was more than happy to point out Constance's numerous misdeeds but also loved her for being a bad girl. Constance tried to seduce Nas but he turned her down. The reason being something that even I didn't see coming.

Constance being the daughter of Mr. Nas might be one of the biggest mindfucks in the show's history but it oddly worked here. Oh and that young man that Constance has been gaslighting and drugging? He's only her half brother. Yup, I'm talking about the bloke who recently discovered 616 branded above his backside a few episodes. 

Ben and the rather tedious Ashley went to a tattoo parlour to get some answers from a rather unhelpful artist. Ben got more flashbacks and realised he was raised by Satanists. He also went back to using AI to draw a rather obvious conclusion about Mr. Nas and we even got a slight glimpse of a darker side to Ben.

Ben attempted to kill the older Nas until the younger one revealed himself to the flustered hospice caretaker. It's a solid enough cliffhanger as Ben got to be in the same room with two very different versions of his real father. Ben's probably gonna need a lot of therapy if he gets out of this season alive.

- I knew Ashley wasn't to be trusted. In the least shocking reveal, she was working for Constance and Mr. Nas.

- Ben's nicknames expanded this week to Doogie Howser and Chicken by Mr. Phibes and Benny Brown Eyes by Mr. Nas.

- Taylor Dorium Nas or I'm Your Lord Satan. Ben literally needed his AI app to tell him that.

- Constance suggested Adelaide for the postal service and Tate for FOX News to Mr. Nas. Are we going to see either of them again before the season ends?

- Michael Langdon was finally mentioned and in the most deadbeat dad of ways by Mr. Nas. Constance's "grandson" was also a half brother. Bloody hell.

- Chronology: Set during the night for the whole episode.

The Devil Is In The Details provided a huge information dump for both Constance and Ben as characters. I think I like Constance being Nas's daughter more than I like Ben being his heir apparent. At the same time, I'm just happy the story moved along faster with this one and the next episode.

Rating: 7 out of 10

My Review of Pinocchio Unstrung (2026)

 

Written And Directed by  Rhys Frake-Waterfield

Pinocchio: "I don't like killing those people."

Having watched this movie, I'm officially caught up with this franchise. This was definitely a very, very gnarly depiction of the wooden boy who wanted to be a real one, no matter the lengths he'd go to.

Of course this Pinocchio (Jude-Evan Lloyd) was more of a prisoner and pawn of his maker, Geppetto (Richard Brake) and the latter had more of a preference for his human grandson, James (Cameron Bell). There's an instant bond between Pinocchio and James. It's a nice bond until it became very messy.

Pinocchio might want to be a real boy but he's got a lot to learn about humanity and his attempts of trying to help James went down a rather murderous route. James got involved in a car crash and Pinocchio horrifically ripped the guy to pieces.

For a large portion of this movie, Pinocchio was also being manipulated by the Talking Cricket (Robert Englund) at the behest of Wood Mother (Emma Tate). Both are pretty awful but actively encouraged Pinocchio's killing spree and consumption of organs. There's also a rather brutal scene that made me feel bad for a fricking dentist.

Anyways, I'll give this movie points because James had allies in both his friend Dudley (Jack Art Gray) and his teacher, Mia (Jessica Balmer) and Pinocchio had his own crisis of conscience. Pinocchio basically went from villain to antihero.

Geppetto of course took on the villain part, being a former student of a mad scientist and outright psychopath. There's a decent performance from Richard Brake but it's a rather rushed conclusion that seemed more interested in setting up a potential sequel than offering an ending to this one.

- There's a post credit scene where the Cricket tried to use vines off the tree to revive Geppetto.

- Robert Englund is mostly known for playing Freddy Krueger while Richard Brake has been a frequent collaborator for Rob Zombie. 

- Scott Chambers briefly appeared as Christopher Robin as did Peter DeSouza-Feighoney as Michael Darling.

- Chronology: Present day England.

Rushed ending to one side, Pinocchio Unstrung was decent enough. I do think getting the likes of Robert Englund and Richard Brake helped a bit with the film and the gore factor had a few moments that made me look away.

Rating: 6 out of 10 

My Review of Bambi: The Reckoning (2025)

 

Written by Rhys Warrington

Directed by Dan Allen

Michael: "You ever shot a deer?"

Tyler: "No. Have you?"

Michael: "Yeah, once."

I had actually forgotten about the Twisted Childhood Universe until I was scrolling and saw this movie. I already ventured into the gnarly takes on Winnie the Pooh and Peter Pan, what not an orphaned deer on a murderous rampage?

The movie started as you'd expect with Bambi losing his mother as expected. He's mostly alone until he mated with Faline and they had a fawn together. Then Faline got hit by a toxic waste truck and died and being whacked with a spade brought out Bambi's feral side.

Let's just say this deer isn't happy with a herbivore diet plan. In fact most of the characters in this film (not that they're particularly fleshed out) learned the hard way that Bambi had a lethal streak to him as well as a taste for human flesh.

Speaking of humans and because we needed a few as protagonists - there was mother and son duo, Xana (Roxanne McKee) and Benji (Tom Mulheron). They're likable enough as characters and just wanted to see Simon's (Alex Cooke) family, mostly his dementia suffering mother, Mary (Nicola Wright). It seemed like she knew more about Bambi than she was letting on.

The rest of the family included the likes of Andrew (Russell Geoffrey Banks), Harriet (Samira Mighty) and Harrison (Joseph Greenwood). The latter in particular was a dick to both Mary and Benji for no reason at all. Throw in some other horrible characters like Tyler (Big Tobz) and Eddie (Ewan Borthwick) and perhaps Bambi had a point after all.

Remember the fawn I mentioned earlier in the review? They're important because they were being mistreated by Tyler and Eddie and then that fawn was made an orphan by Michael (Adrian Relph). History repeated itself in quite a horrid way.

- Michael killed Bambi's mother and then Bambi. Mary killed Michael. Mary was the best human in this film. Mary also did the opening narration.

- Benji was convinced his parents were getting deported. I'm sure he meant divorced.

- There was some feral rabbits in this film but no characters from the previous three films.

- Chronology: Set during the course of a night. There are no day scenes in this movie whatsoever.

I found Bambi: The Reckoning to be okay enough. It's not particularly good or even bad. The acting's fine, the story moved at a fast enough pace but a lot of the scenes were hard to actually see because it was so poorly lit. The ending was top notch though. Best part of the film.

Rating: 6 out of 10 

My Review of The Raven (1963)

 

Written by Richard Matheson 

Directed by Roger Corman

Dr. Craven (to Dr. Bedlo): "Shut your beak! Quoth the raven, nevermore."

Last week, I had a look at the Vincent Price and Roger Corman team up of The Pit And The Pendulum and while I'm not reviewing their collaboration of Edgar Allen Poe adaptations in order, I will try to get through them all as best I can.

Vincent Price in this adaptation took on the role of magician Dr. Erasmus Craven. He's got a daughter named Estelle (Olive Sturgess) and he's mourning the loss of his second wife, Lenore (Hazel Court). Estelle on the other hand wasn't particularly sad that her stepmother wasn't around anymore.

There's also the titular Raven itself. Actually it's a peer named Dr. Adolphus Bedlo (Peter Lorre) and the raven made his presence known to Craven until the latter changed him back into a human. We also got to meet Bedlo's son, Rexford (Jack Nicholson) who seemed taken with Estelle but also had his moment of madness.

Because this movie needed a villain, who better than to get Boris Karloff as the fanatical Dr. Scarabus. Oh and Lenore wasn't dead at all. She just faked her death so she could help to contrive to get Craven into Scarabus's hands and just so the latter could take his powers.

That was Scarabus's big plan. He wanted Erasmus's powers and both Lenore and Bedlo came in handy. There's an impressive magical duel between the two of them and even a poor attempt from Lenore to switch sides when Scarabus was losing.

There's also a rather satisfying comeuppance for Bedlo. He overplayed his hand and ended up as a mute raven as punishment for his misdeeds. That was certainly a way to have Erasmus put a spin on some very popular lines from the infamous story.

- Peter Lorre did ad-lib a lot for this movie and there was tension between him and Jack Nicholson.

- Boris Karloff was in the 1935 version of this movie but that had a different story.

- Boris Karloff wasn't a fan of the cape he had to wear or the scenes where him and Vincent Price were in the air.

- Chronology: It's 1506 in a dreary December.

The Raven (1963) had some strong performances from Price, Lorre and Karloff. It's a good take on the popular Edgar Allen Poe story. It's probably one of the best takes if I'm being honest.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of Octopussy (1983)

 

Written by George MacDonald Fraser And Richard Maibaum And Michael G. Wilson

Directed by John Glen

Vijay: "Is he still there?"

Q: "You must be joking! 007 on an island populated exclusively by women? We won't see him till dawn!"

This film might have the funniest/rudest title for a James Bond movie. It's titular character as played by Maud Adams certainly wasn't short changed in this film either. She's a bit more than a love interest for Roger Moore's spy. 

She's a jewel smuggler and a wealthy businesswoman to boot and maybe the closest to an equal that Moore's version of Bond might have in this movie. There's good chemistry between the two of them as their dynamic was both antagonistic and flirtatious in equation. Even the ending somewhat subverted the usual ending for a Bond film.

Octopussy also ran an Octopus cult (no, seriously she did) and was working with the actual villain of the piece - Kamal Khan (Louis Jourdan). Khan was an exiled Afghan prince and he wasn't best pleased with James's refusal to die. Get in line, Khan.

As a villain, he's mostly interesting enough and had no problem getting Magda (Kristina Wayborn) to seduce Bond. Magda's not as interesting a character as Octopussy. She's more of a generic character in the mix of more interesting ones.

Throw in an alliance with Khan and rogue Soviet General Orlov (Steven Berkoff) and there's a plot to destabilise NATO for both James and Octopussy to stop them. There's a bit with a Fabergé egg, an ally in Vijay (Vijay Amritraj) and James avenging the death of 009 (Andy Bradford) and there's plenty going on here.

- Maud Adams previously played Andrea Anderson in The Man With The Golden Gun. She's better served here.

- This was the final role for Paul Hardwick who played a Soviet chairman. Robert Brown is now playing M.

- Standout music: Rita Coolidge's All Time High.

- Chronology: East Berlin, Udaipur and both East and West Germany.

Octopussy was a better movie than expected and they certainly had fun with that title choice. A good dynamic between Roger Moore and Maud Adams certainly helped things.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of Carrie - Season 1 (Amazon Prime Series, 2026)

 

Written by Mike Flanagan And Elizabeth Padden And Justina Ireland And Dani Parker And Elan Gale And Alexandra Magistro And Rebecca Klingel And Jamie Flanagan

Directed by Mike Flanagan And Kate Siegel And Axelle Carolyn And Kyra Sedgwick And Hiromi Katama 

Carrie: "All I ever wanted was to go to school."

Am I terrible Stephen King fan for saying that I wasn't chomping at the bit for another adaptation of this particular book? Am I a terrible Mike Flanagan fan for wanting him to do something original instead? I don't think I am tbh. This book has been adapted enough times and Flanagan definitely needs to do something original.

Putting those things to one side, I'm fortunately relieved to say that this eight part series for Amazon Prime was mostly a success. This was a Carrie White (Summer H. Howell) for the 2020s and it's a modern take that managed to mostly work for the titular character and the people drawn inyo her world.

The lynchpin of any adaptation would be the relationship between Carrie and her fanatical mother, Margaret (Samantha Sloyan). Again, it mostly worked because Margaret's extremities in regards to her daughter are still here but softened/modernised for a current audience. This Margaret will use social media to tackle Carrie's bullies and mobilise support but this was also a Margaret who cannot handle Carrie questioning the world around and showed genuine fear of her daughter's abilities.

The interesting but questionable change was Margaret having latent powers of her own. It's touched upon briefly in flashbacks and presented itself during a crucial moment in the finale. It also put Margaret in the firing line of a mystery cult led by the equally mysterious Adelaide (Kate Siegel). I'm not happy with how Margaret's story concluded in this take of the source material.

Having a cult of people with similar abilities to Carrie felt like an obvious way to prolong this story and push it to getting a potential second season. There's a lot of focus on a character named Emaline (Thalia Dudek), who befriended Carrie, had similar abilities to Carrie and also took away some of Carrie's agency during the very moment that should've been Carrie's and Carrie's alone.

Yes, I'm talking about the prom. I didn't like Emaline's involvement in that crucial moment, though it didn't negate the fact that Carrie still was mostly responsible for the destruction at hand. It's an okay depiction but most of the movies handled the prom scenes better. This show fleshed certain characters out better than any movie.

In particular, this show just gave audiences the best version of superbitch Chris Hargensen (Alison Thornton). An absolutely layered but utterly hateful version of the high school bully. There's a moment where it looked like Chris and Carrie could've been friends and it's cruelly decimated. Chris's family life with two separated parents - John (Michael Trucco) and Madison (Heather Graham), the latter's new boyfriend, Kent Kirby (Gil Bellows) and his daughter, Brooklyn (Rowan Danielle) was dysfunctional along with her relationship with bad boy, Billy Nolan (Arthur Conti). Outside of Carrie and Margaret, Chris was the most fleshed out character here.

Less fleshed out were the likes of Sue Snell (Siena Agudong), Tommy Ross (Joel Oulette) and Tina Blake (Josie Totah) but they do get a few interesting bits. The actual high school staff were a mixed bag of ineffective, incompetent and genuinely helpful. With characters like Principal Henry Grayle (Matthew Lillard), Rita Desjardin (Amber Midthunder), Seth Piest (Rahul Kohli) and Peter Morton (Tim Bagley), it's not hard to see why Carrie would eventually be tipped over the edge.

- The episode titles are First Period, Foreign Language, Social Studies, Dramatic Arts, Physical Education, Home Economics, Romantic Literature and AP Physics.

- Other noteworthy people to appear in the show included Katee Sackhoff, Tahmoh Penikett, Ruth Codd, Delainey Hayles as well as Bryan Fuller and Don Mancini.

- CarrieRed might have been set up to make fun of Carrie but it also exposed Seth Piest having sexual relationships with students, leading to his death in the sixth episode.

- I did like how the credit scenes kept getting redder with each episode.

- Standout music: The Newton Brothers provided the score for the show.

- Chronology: Mostly set in Thomas Ewen Consolidated High School, Maine. 

I had my reservations about this version of Carrie and I can't say that I loved everything that Mike Flanagan did with the material but I liked it a lot than I expected to and that's a relief. There's some genuine standout performances from Summer H. Howell, Samantha Sloyan and Alison Thornton but no one puts a foot wrong.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of Carry On Screaming! (1966)

 

Written by Talbot Rothwell

Directed by Gerald Thomas

Orlando: "What time is it?"

Valeria: "Just past December."

Orlando: "I told you not to wake me up 'til the beginning of March!"

I have a bit of a thing for the Carry On movies. They're a bit outdated but a guilty pleasure nonetheless. Seeing as it's spooky season, of course I had to watch this one.

The film started with a couple named Albert (Jim Dale) and Doris (Angela Douglas). They're in the woods about to get more acquainted and then Doris ended up getting snatched by a monster named Oddball (Tom Clegg). Doris wouldn't be the only one getting taken by this creature.

In fact there's a spate of disappearances and connected to them were the seductive Valeria (Fenella Fielding) and her mad scientist brother, Dr. Orlando Watt (Kenneth Williams). Oh and their servant, Sockett (Bernard Bresslaw) had no problem aiding the demented siblings.

The siblings were kidnapping young women and turning them into mannequins. Of course, they also had to contend with the likes of Detective Constable Slobotham (Peter Butterworth) and more specifically, Detective Sergeant Sidney Bung (Harry H. Corbett).

The latter in particular was a henpecked husband to Emily (Joan Sims) and was easily led and seduced by Valeria. I'd argue almost too easily seduced, which did lead to Bung being temporarily turned into a hairy monster. It didn't last that long as the movie progressed. 

There's a good team between Bung and Albert in order to try and save their respective loves from being mannequins forever. One was more successful than the other, Orlando embraced his villainy before his comeuppance and Valeria herself had a change of living arrangements that I'm sure she'd take some getting used to.

- Sidney James had played Detective Bung in previous movies but the role was recast here as he wasn't available.

- Jon Pertwee had the role of Dr. Fettle in this film. 

- Gerald Thomas had a voice cameo in this film as Oddball Junior.

- Orlando and Valeria were originally meant to be father and daughter instead of brother and sister.

- Standout music: Ray Pilgrim performed the theme tune, Carry On Screaming.

- Chronology: Set in Edwardian era, in Hocombe Woods.

Carry On Screaming! is pretty much what you'd expect a horror themed adventure would be from this particular comedy series. It's enjoyable enough with the expected innuendos and some good special effects and prosthetics for some of the monstrous looks on display.

Rating: 7 out of 10 

My Review of The Pit And The Pendulum (1961)

 

Written by Richard Matheson 

Directed by Roger Corman

Don Nicholas Medina: "I will tell you where you are. You are about to enter hell, Bartholomew. Hell! The Netherworld. The infernal region. The abode of the damned. The place of torment. Pandemonium. "Abbadon, "Tophet", "Gehenna". "Naraka", the pit! And the pendulum."

I fancied a bit of Edgar Allen Poe and one of the best adaptations of his work was this underrated film from 1961 starring the iconic Vincent Price.

In this film, Price took on the role of Nicholas Medina, who lived in a nice castle but was also grieving the loss of his wife, Elizabeth (Barbara Steel). Elizabeth died of fright but her Englishman brother, Francis Barnard (John Kerr) had doubts.

From the moment he appeared on screen, Francis served as a foil to Nicholas. He didn't believe the circumstances behind his sister's death and wasn't convinced when Doctor Leon (Antony Carbone) tried to convince him otherwise.

On top of that, it also seemed like Nicholas had a traumatic past involving his father, Sebastian (Vincent Price). In the present day, Nicholas also appeared to be losing his sanity, something that wasn't helped by the fact that Elizabeth was alive and in cahoots with Doctor Leone.

Elizabeth and Leone being lovers with a long game plot to see Nicholas's fortune went completely wrong with Nicholas thinking he was his father and mistaking Elizabeth and Leone for his mother and uncle. Then Francis got to experience the actual title of the film itself.

He got trapped in a pit with a pendulum coming close to slicing him in half had Nicholas's sister, Catherine (Luana Anders) and servant Maximilian (Patrick Westwood). The ending for Nicholas was tragic but Elizabeth's final fate was so much worse.

- The success of this film would have Roger Corman direct several Edgar Allen Poe adaptations, including The Raven (1963).

- The following Poe quote "...the agony of my soul found vent in one loud, long, and final scream of despair."  That was a part of the credits for the film.

- For TV rights, an opening scene with Catherine Medina was filmed where she was committed to an asylum and retold the events.

- Chronology: 1547 Spain with flashbacks to Nicholas's childhood.

The Pit And The Pendulum (1961) would definitely be one of the best adaptations of an Edgar Allen Poe story to date. It's beautifully shot, the performances are on point and that ending was such a grim way to conclude it.

Rating: 8 out of 10 

My Review of American Horror Story: 13 - Hell No

 

Written by Ned Martel And Charlie Carver 

Directed by Crystle Roberson Dorsey 

Cordelia (to Fiona/Marie/Papa Legba): "United we will defeat the Devil himself."

With only five episodes left to go, you'd think so, wouldn't you? Then again, it's the Devil and no matter how Avengers this season will get, there needs to be some major casualties. Cordelia going on about so much death should have some actual weight to it.

I liked how this episode started with Fiona and Cordelia actually bonding with each other. Being in Hell really seems to have given Fiona much to think about in regards to her past actions. For now, it does seem like she genuinely wants to help save the Coven against the Devil.

I'm glad this episode wasted no time in having the Coven realise they're up against the Devil and that Cordelia took the steps to fight fire with fire. Cordelia's trip to Hell and her scenes with Papa Legba (Orlando Jones) was brilliant. They both gave it their all but Cordelia had her trump card against Legba.

Papa wasn't pleased about Fiona being plucked out of Hell and less pleased when she stood up to him as well. In fact, he was outright furious with Cordelia and Fiona but also afraid of pissing off Satan himself. Saying that, it didn't stop him from suggesting Marie Laveau (Angela Bassett) being added into the mix, but only if someone volunteered to go to Hell.

This was where Queenie stepped back into the horrors of fast food service and who did she have to deal with? Yup, Madame Delphine Lalaurie (Kathy Bates) herself and while the latter's nastier racism was dialled down, Delphine was still a bit of a Karen in Hell. Queenie's method of dealing with Lalaurie was delightfully satisfying to watch. These last two episodes have been excellent for Queenie in general.

Now, where the episode lost some points for me was Fiona and Marie's banter. Marie in particular was almost too hostile to Fiona and Cordelia and it felt like the writers wanted to write some bitchy one liners for a moment where it wasn't earned. It was a good thing that Papa Legba got them all to focus on the problem at hand.

- I can't get over Kathy Bates getting her name in the opening credits this season and this was the only scene she ended up shooting.

- I really didn't like Morwenna blaming Voodoo, even if I could see why she leapt to such a conclusion.

- Myrtle got a mention as Cordelia apparently bit her as a child. Myrtle should be back next week.

- Of course this season was going to recreate the "knotty pine" moment. Points to it having Fiona trapped in an actual maze I guess.

- Is Queenie really Cordelia's favourite? That's actually really nice. Zoe and Misty aren't getting mentioned, are they?

- Chronology: From where the previous episode left off.

Hell No certainly had it's moments and returns and callbacks galore. To be slightly controversial here, I do hope that the rest of the season doesn't have the Coven drown out the Apollyon story and that there's a good balance between both as they will inevitably intersect from next week onwards.

Rating: 7 out of 10